


Let's Go On Dreaming

by incendiarywit (p_diyos)



Series: Let's Go On Dreaming and Other Stories [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Dance, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Romance, Slow Build
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-14
Updated: 2017-11-17
Packaged: 2018-11-28 22:57:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 36,712
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11428005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/p_diyos/pseuds/incendiarywit
Summary: Graduate, get a job, rinse, and repeat. This was the formula Nishinoya Yuu swore by for all his young adult life. That's until his rotten luck and so-called delinquent reputation led him to Azumane Asahi, who helps Noya rediscover a dream he promised to leave behind forever.(Projected Post Date for Chapter 6: April)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> You know when you first start writing fics for a new pairing, you should start small?
> 
> Yeah, didn’t do that. Clearly. I swear this was only supposed to be 15k and published sometime in April, but it took on a life of its own. It’s my first major venture into Asanoya and Haikyuu in general, so bear with me on characterization! I tried my very best and I’m still getting a handle on it.
> 
> It’s very loosely based on Step Up at this point, but also very expanded. I took many liberties. There are a few dance terms in this, but nothing that won’t hinder you from understanding the story.
> 
> Thank you so much to [hotaryu](http://archiveofourown.org/users/hotaryu/pseuds/hotaryu) for beta-ing this!
> 
> Rated M for later chapters.
> 
> \---
> 
> “And you, great soul, is there yet hope in you  
> To find some dream without the lying hue  
> That gold or wave offers to fleshy eyes?”
> 
> Excerpt from _The Graveyard by the Sea_ by Paul Valéry

It’s bright, where Noya stood.

The floors were a dark brown, almost black, and they shone against the glaring yellow light. Specs of dust floated all around him like bright stars. He stepped forward slowly, squinting and shielding his eyes with his hand as he tried to look beyond.

It was silent in this room. So much that his slow breathing sounded uncomfortably, almost abnormally loud. A tiny tap of his foot resulted in a loud echo, a fading repetition of taps that let him know just how expansive it was.

His eyes adjusted slowly. When he finally took in the view in front of him, he felt his shoulders sink along with his stomach, disappointment bubbling in his chest.

The rows upon rows of seats before him were empty.

*

Nishinoya Yuu didn’t mean to do it, and considering how his life has gone so far, it was the understatement of the century.

Contrary to popular belief, he _wasn’t_ a delinquent. The only factors that made people _think_ he was included: his hair (predominantly black and spiked higher than the Skytree probably, with faded red bangs falling across his forehead), his default expression (“Always too intense to a stranger.” Suga told him on one occasion), and the way he dressed (he _liked_ his studded belts, sue him). Other than that, he was too busy trying to make ends meet to get an inch close to trouble.

Trouble, as it turned out, always seemed to find him.

How was Noya supposed to know those props cost a fortune? If they actually bothered to fix that broken lock on the window, they wouldn’t be having this problem. He was just trying to get away from the _real_ punks. So what if he threw a few too many colourful words? He had to defend himself somehow. He got enough crap from the universe and he wasn’t about to take any more.

Of course, now that he was stuck with three hundred - _three hundred!_ \- hours of community service in the very place he “broke into”, which was apparently a big-time performing arts college, he wished he kept his big mouth shut.

Noya was supposed to be over this phase of his life. It was a good thing his mother wasn’t going to ever find out about this, lest his best friends slip up and accidentally blurt it out when they all came home. Which, both fortunately and not, was not going to happen anytime in the near future. Except for Ryuu, maybe. No, not maybe. More of definitely, since he was the only one who had his life together.

He still had to talk to his manager at the izakaya to change his hours. Shit.

Noya groaned loudly, rubbing his eyes as he rounded the corner, facing the school in question from across the street. He was only getting a good look at it now, in the mid-afternoon light that felt like fire to his retinas. He realized with a slap to his forehead that it was probably the worst place for him to run to when he was in trouble. He was lucky they weren’t making him pay for anything.

Machida School of the Arts was a relatively small building with only four floors, but it was wide, taking nearly half the block. It was freshly painted and predominantly beige, except for the borders lined with white. The front had a large space for windows taking up at least three floors, the sun reflecting off them and bouncing right into Noya’s eyes. It opened to an empty courtyard, though from there he couldn’t see much else. The rest of his view was blocked by a fence that went all the way around to the corner. Even with his height, he could spy the little alarms at the gates.

Just what had he gotten himself into?

With a tired sigh that resigned himself to the acceptance of his doom, he walked past the gates, and followed directions to the dean’s office. He could hear a buzz of voices as he approached the main door, and he pushed it open.

Yep, definitely the worst place for him to break into to hide. And to accidentally break some expensive props in the process. He clung tighter to the sling of his worn pink bag as he weaved through the halls, bypassing clusters of people leaning against the beige walls. His shoes squeaked against the off-white tiles, and he felt himself shrink the more he quickly took in the people around him. He probably looked like he lived in the dumpster, compared to everyone else. They looked like they walked right off a runway.

As soon as he arrived and received another lengthy lecture, the dean detailed his duties. Most of it was cleaning, but today he asked Noya to replace the burnt out light bulbs in all classrooms. He handed Noya a box with contents that clinked loudly as it knocked into his chest. Noya tried his best not to scowl too much.

“I want them returned to this office at precisely 5:30 PM everyday,” The dean finished with narrowed eyes, handing Noya the keys. Noya nodded glumly, already making his way down to the janitor’s room.

The work was almost mindless, and he would have preferred it to precariously balancing trays and rattling off orders at the izakaya. It was like his chores at home. Except it wasn’t, because he didn’t live in a large school with high-ceilinged rooms. Or in a compound lined with display cases and furniture that probably cost more than his entire apartment building.

If he wasn’t sentenced to it, it would be fine. But he was, and the dullness of it made him feel like he was sentenced to some Herculean task. Every movement took three times more effort that it normally would.

Noya knew at this point that three hundred hours weren’t going to go quickly.

He started with the first floor, working his way up at a pace that would have made the snail win the race. Vacuuming the room for band practice is a bit of a pain, considering he was strictly advised not to move the chairs around. He took nearly an hour in the disaster that was the art room, scrubbing the somewhat indelible paint from the floors. The only bit of mercy granted to him was that few light bulbs needed replacing, so he didn’t have to lug the ladder into every room.

He sighed loudly, wiping the sweat on his brow with his sleeve before he leaned on the wall. If this was supposed to be some form of penance, he’s already learned his lesson. He’d be eternally grateful for some form of intervention.

Just for fun, and because he was tired all the way to his bones, he waited in the empty hall for it. When nothing happened, he sighed for the nth time that day and just went back to work. He only had one floor left anyway.

The last floor in question was deserted and quiet, all three doors to each room closed. Maybe it was the faculty area? Administration? Noya wasn’t looking forward to that at all.  The dean was enough authority for one day.

He opted for door at the end of the hall, turning the knob and pushing it open. It revealed an empty room that looked barely used, and much older than the others. The linoleum was chipped off at some corners, and there were water stains at one end of the room. Not the faculty then, thankfully.

After mopping up and changing all the light bulbs, he wiped his hands on his uniform. He was ready to move on when he noticed that one side of the room was painted in black. There was a door at the very right, perpendicular to one of the windows.

“Huh?” How he missed that detail, Noya wasn’t sure. Maybe he was a lot more exhausted than he thought he was.

Noya lingered by the door, wondering why it was even here in the first place. It almost felt like a secret passageway to something. That, or he’s watched too much anime with Suga and Ryuu again. When he finally turned the knob though, he found he wasn’t far off.

Unlike the room he was still in, the floors were hardwood that only needed a bit of polishing. Two of the walls were also black, while the other was a set of large windows lined in white, golden rays from the late afternoon sun streaming in. He could see the tops of the trees below, and the grayish yellow tinge of the courtyard. The remaining wall was all mirrors with a barre mounted against it, the rails a dull gold. A dance studio, he thought as his chest relaxed. Finally, something familiar.

“Um…”

Noya blinked and focused his attention to the center of the room. If Noya _looked_ like a delinquent, than this guy was probably the real deal. Even from the arc of the doorway, this guy seemed to exude a presence that was larger than life. His height and build didn’t help in that aspect, broad shoulders barely concealed in a large black shirt and long legs in black sweats. His brown hair was pulled back into a low, loose bun, some pieces escaping the hold and framing his face.

Looking at him now, if Noya felt like dumpster trash awhile ago when he entered the school, now he felt something akin to pond scum. Or something like a poser, considering his hairstyle and default scowl didn’t hold a candle to this guy. If he knew, he would have dressed a little better.

“Uh, sorry,” Noya said as he stepped into the room. “I didn’t see…uh.” Why couldn’t he talk? “I just need to change a few light bulbs. And clean up a bit,” he explained, picking one of the ones he replaced from his pocket.

“Oh, sure thing,” The tall guy said. His voice was different from what Noya had in mind - soft in pitch, but low like rumbling thunder in the distance. “Do you need me to go?”

“No no it’s cool, I’ll be quick!” Noya told him, his voice a little too loud even to his ears. “Just…do whatever it was you were doing! You won't even notice I’m here.” He did his best to give a reassuring grin.

It was received with a look of surprise. “Oh, okay.”

Figuring Noya’s stalled enough, he brought in the dry mop and turned his mind off again. He was supposed to be here on some form of punishment after all, he thought as he pushed against the hardwood floors. He brought in the buffer and worked on the floor until it was spotless and smooth against the soles of his shoes. He finally brought in the ladder to check the lights.

The entire time, the tall guy kept quiet, practicing turns in front of the mirror. Noya tried to watch subtly, keeping his head bent low but eyes wandering. He couldn’t help it, Noya was like a moth to a flame every time someone danced.

The guy looked so serious, glaring at his reflection as he spotted. The turn itself looked familiar, but wasn’t something Noya’s ever tried seriously before. If it was, he’d feel that familiar tug in his gut, the same kind that he got whenever he used to watch dance videos with Suga, or when he came across the rare street dancer in one of the parks in Ueno. His muscles twitched, something he always got weird looks for, and his brain rewired itself to pick up the underlying beat in every song.

Which is to say, Noya had no idea how to do the turn. The guy had one leg extended, toes pointed and foot curved, and he pushed up with the other foot on the ground with every completed cycle. He just kept going, staying in that one spot as his body cleanly cut through the air with every move.

No, not cutting through the air. It was like the air around the guy only aided to how he made it look as easy as breathing. It reminded Noya of little music boxes. Specifically the ones lined up in the windowsill of the antique store he used to pass on the way to school. He remembered the slow turning figurines frozen in graceful poses, spinning to a nostalgic, slightly hypnotic tune.

The guy stopped eventually, letting out a loud huff as he rested his hands on his waist. Noya had enough sense left in his semi-fried, very exhausted brain to look away and come back to the world. Replace the light bulbs. Put back his things. Get out of here. And stop being creepy; staring was hardly ever okay.

Noya repeated this to himself as he set the creaky metal ladder up and climbed it, ignoring the urge to look down at the guy again. Dancer, he mentally corrected. It’s been awhile since he’s seen anyone dance up close. That was probably why he kept looking. Yeah, that logic sounded perfectly…well, sound, he supposed.

It was quiet for a long time. Noya heard a muted click and the low, dark tone of a piano flowed into the room. A soulful, almost sad voice followed, the lyrics familiar. It wasn’t the original singer, though, if his memory was right. Noya lost his inner battle, and he looked down from the ladder, just as the dancer below flew across the room.

At least that’s what it _looked_ like to Noya. The dancer moved effortlessly, leaping from one point and landing for a second, before leaping again. His arms were curved above his head, gaze turned downward as he swayed to the music. He then leapt and turned midair, before striding once, twice, and doing it again.

Noya leaned as close as he could, the ladder creaking weakly in protest, to get a better look. Now the dancer jumped, twirling in the air and staying suspended for longer than a few seconds. The music reached the chorus and the dancer moved with a little more power. Noya leaned back for a second from the suddenness of it, before leaning closer again. The dancer looked like he was in a trance, moving to a song that called to him and only him, and Noya felt like he was caught in the undertow of it.

He watched the dancer lay down on the floor before his back arched in a perfect curve. He pushed himself up on his tiptoes, rising slowly, as if there was a string pulling him up and reeling him in. He then threw his body into a floating jump that defied several laws of gravity, extending his arms as he did so.

The dancer turned, and _kept_ turning. Noya lost count at around five or six, and he could feel his mouth hanging open, the edges of his lips drying out. He must have had it open since the start, too engrossed in the sight before him to notice.

The music ended, and the dancer stopped just a few feet away from the ladder. He fell to his knees as the piano faded into the background. Even more strands of hair escaped his bun, and fell into his eyes delicately.

Noya wanted to react, to clap wildly, _something,_ anything to vocalize the swirl of emotions that have gathered in his chest. As it was, he had his hands holding on to the ladder. He opted for the next best thing.

“That was so fucking cool!” 

The dancer, who was just getting back up on his feet, probably jumped five feet in the air because of Noya, eyebrows furrowing at not finding the source of the voice. It looked almost comical, the way his eyes widened, and it was such a contrast from just a few seconds ago.

“Up here!”

Finally, the dancer turned to the ladder, his eyes traveling up to see Noya.

“Oh, hi. Again,” he greeted, raising his hand hesitantly in an attempt to wave.

It wasn’t the reaction Noya was expecting, which left him both confused and progressively delighted. This dancing muscular-gazelle-hybrid of a person was actually, fortunately, a human.

“Hey!” Noya waved back, one hand shooting straight up in the air. “Seriously, that was fucking awesome! How long have you been dancing?”

“Uh…” The dancer shrugged, looking down at the floor as if it would give him the answer. He looked back up. “About fourteen years at least?”

“Fourteen years?” Noya yelled, leaning forward, the ladder shaking dangerously. _“Seriously_? That’s so cool, holy shit!”

“Careful!” The dancer called out, holding his hands out and staring at the wobbling ladder in horror.

“It’s fine, I won’t -!”

Noya spoke too soon. He really shouldn’t have challenged fate, not when he was teetering off the top of a ladder about eleven feet tall. With a frightening creak, he felt wind rush between his arms as he lost his balance. His feet slipped from the top step and he felt that overwhelming, rapidly building feeling of _‘Oh shit’_ as he began to fall.

He knew the feeling of hardwood against his skull from slipping so much as a child and as a teenager. He fully expected his head to thud against it, or his elbow or shoulder to shoot pain all throughout him. Instead he felt the wind rush out of his lungs in a loud ‘ _oof!_ ’ as his back made contact with something much softer than the floor.

When Noya’s brain finally caught up with him, and wasn’t still stuck somewhere near the ceiling, he realized he fell on a _person_.

The dancer grunted underneath Noya, obviously in pain. His stomach curled inward somewhere below Noya’s back. His arms were trapped underneath Noya, and he was already trying to free them. Noya whipped his head around until he saw the dancer’s red face. That was enough to make him stand up like he was hit with an electric shock.

Great, just _great_. It was already enough that he was sentenced to service _here_ of all places, but he should have known his luck (or lack thereof) could only get worse.

Noya stepped closer, already holding out his arm. “Shit, I’m so -“

The dancer looked up at Noya, eyes widening. “Oh god, are you okay?!” He tried to sit up, but immediately winced, his arm clutching his stomach.

“Am _I_ okay? I should be asking you that!“ Noya exclaimed, feeling slightly hysterical. “Are you for real? Did you just try to _catch_ me?”

The dancer grunted and reached out to take Noya’s hand. Noya pulled him up, though he could feel the dancer do half the work for him. Wow he was _heavy_.

“Well, I tried to,” he said with a grimace. He set his eyes to Noya and wow, those were really big eyes. “Didn’t really…work out so well. Are you okay?”

“Are you kidding me?” Noya reached out again, letting go of the dancers hand to look for damage anywhere else, setting his hands on either side of the dancer’s arms. “I _fell_ on you. Does anything feel broken?”

The dancer removed his arm around his stomach, wide eyes going wider, eyeing Noya’s hands. “I - I’m fine, I think,” he said, voice going small, taking a shy edge. “Nothing that won’t be fixed tomorrow. Please, are you okay?”

“I’m fine!” Noya insisted, pulling away. He felt more embarrassed than anything else. He wanted to crawl into the nearest small space and not come out for a year or two. Maybe three. He moved his shoulders around to drive his point home. “Just a little sore, but I’ll be fine. I mean, I’ve fallen off trees before.”

The dancer looked slightly mortified now. “What? B-But that’s hardly reassuring," he said. “You’re sure? I could take you to the infirmary if you feel anything.”

“I promise, I’m okay,” Noya said. With whatever dignity he had left, he gave the dancer a grin. “Anyway, I just had to tell you how cool you looked when you danced. Holy shit. I mean, I’ve seen _dancers_ , but you’re like a whole other league!”

“I…well.” The dancer bent his head, expression split between bashfulness and confusion. “Thank you, though…I wouldn’t go as far to say I’m in another um, league -“

“You should watch yourself dance more often, then,” Noya resolved. “I’m Noya, by the way.”

“Azumane…oh, Asahi. It’s Asahi,” The dancer - no, _Asahi_ \- clarified. “You…Are you a student here, Noya?”

“Well…no.” Noya deflated a little, cheeks feeling warm. “I’m here on community service? I broke some stuff. Not intentionally, though!”

“Not intentionally,” Asahi repeated. Noya felt his shoulders curl into himself slightly, already waiting for the skeptical look he’s come to expect. He shouldn’t be so familiar with that expression, yet his so-called delinquent record in high school only worked against him.

Instead of looking judgmental like Noya expected however, Asahi just looked confused. His thick eyebrows almost met in the middle, with only a fold of skin separating it. “An accident?”

Noya made a hesitant sound. “Sorta,” he allowed, before he sighed. “It’s a long story, really. I don’t have the best of luck with stuff like that. The hair doesn’t really help.”

“Oh. I kinda get that.” Asahi pointed to himself. “My appearance gets me into trouble, sometimes.”

This made Noya chuckle, and he felt his shoulders relax just a little. “Trouble always finding you too, huh?”

The corners of Asahi’s mouth quirked up. “Unfortunately,” he said in a slightly exasperated tone. One that indicated just how often it’s happened to him. That was enough for Noya to forget his embarrassment for a good minute.

“Well, I think I gotta get back to this.” He flopped his hand to the direction of the traitorous ladder. For something so old and creaky, it was still standing tall. “But it was nice meeting you, Asahi.”

“You too, Noya.” Asahi gave him a tiny smile. “You’re sure you’re okay? You can come back up here if you feel something. I’ll be here all afternoon.”

“I’m sure,” Noya said, returning a smile that came so easily to him. “But I’ll remember that. You swear I didn’t break any bones on you?”

Asahi shook his head. “I’m okay.” He raised his arms, holding them out and turning them over for Noya.

He pretended to inspect them critically, before giving a nod. “Good.” To this, Asahi’s smile grew wider.

Noya cleaned up as fast as he could. He gave himself a mental clap on the back for being able to lift the ladder out of the room with minimal grunting. He gave Asahi a little wave before exiting, which was returned with an even smaller wave.

The two remaining rooms were a music studio, and strangely enough, a regular classroom. The music room was a pain to vacuum considering the space-to-giant-vacuum ratio, but he managed. He put a bit more aggression into cleaning, until the prickling feeling of embarrassment finally left him.

*

Five hours finally ended, and he rushed to the izakaya. Changing his shifts got him a bit of a scolding, but they didn’t really have a choice. One good thing was that Noya was free of his dreaded Wednesday night shifts. It was like his body had a switch as soon as the clock struck nine, but Wednesdays were always the worst. He was convinced the universe conspired to make the most boring day of the week worse than usual.

The walk to the apartment did a lot to lift the tiredness from his shoulders, but not much else. He could feel the collar of his shirt sticking to the back of his neck, and the dried film of sweat on his arms and back. Ugh, if he could teleport from this spot to his bathroom, he would. Unless someone was already there. That would be awkward.

He passed by the convenience store, squinting at the bright lights as he did. The crepe vendo machine that was still out of order. The little cafe at the corner was closing up for the day. He crossed the street and came to face the apartment complex, the off-white structure illuminated by street lamps and individual lights outside each apartment.

Calling it apartment was rather generous. It was an over-glorified matchbox, or someone’s walk-in closet with some living supplies thrown in. Sometimes it made Noya feel five times too large, like a giant trying to navigate someone’s dollhouse. Still, it was in the city and the best one they’ve found with three bedrooms. Despite all that and the paper thin walls, it was something that he and his best friends had to themselves.

The first thing that hit him when he shut the front door is the smell of cooking beef and garlic, and the faint sounds of a sizzling pan. Feeling a bit more invigorated at the promise of freshly cooked food, he hung up his jacket and walked into the kitchen.

“I smell heaven,” Noya said, by way of announcing his arrival.

Ryuu saw him first. He angled his body away from the stove to shoot Noya a grin. “And the little troublemaker has finally arrived.”

“Did you really just say _little_ -“

Suga sighed from their tiny dinner table. “Not before dinner, please,” he scolded lightly, setting his reading glasses down on his open notebooks. The remnants of Suga’s weekly purchase of honey bread pudding sat beside him. He gave Noya a tired smile as he walked in. “How was -“ He narrowed his eyes, and Noya felt like he was suddenly under an x-ray. “Why is your shoulder red? And why are you clutching your back?”

“He’s aging, that’s why,” Ryuu quipped.

“Huh?” Noya removed the hand that was on his back. He didn’t even when that got there. Instead, he pulled at the collar of his shirt, and - oh. That wasn’t there earlier. “Must’ve happened when I fell.”

“Fell?” Ryuu and Suga said in unison and in raised tones.

Noya sighed. “I’m fine!”

Suga got up from his chair, making his way to Noya. “Where’d you fall from?” he asked, just as he lifted the back of Noya’s shirt. “Noya, what the hell! Ryuu, come look at this.”

“Switch with me,” Ryuu said, tapping the wooden spoon on the pan before handing it to Suga. “Let - fucking hell, Noya.”

All the while, Noya felt like he suddenly turned five. He wasn’t even sure at what point did his best friends became so fussy - only that they’ve been like this since they’ve moved to the city.

“C’mon guys,” he said, turning his head to see Ryuu. “It doesn’t even hurt that bad.”

“Did you fall from the stairs or something?”

“Uh…a ladder.”

“How did that _happen?”_ Suga asked, turning the burner off and plating their dinner with a stressed sort of force.

Noya felt all the heat rush to his face. “I was watching this dancer,” he mumbled, pulling his shirt down. He looked around the kitchen for something to do. “I’ll clear the table.”

The kitchen grew quiet, and he caught Suga and Ryuu exchanging looks from the corners of their eyes. They both had their eyebrows raised in various degrees of surprise and worry.

“Okay, I need to hear this story from the beginning,” Ryuu said, heading for the rice cooker. “Because this is starting to sound a little weird.”

“It’s really nothing! I was just in the dance studio, up on a ladder changing some lightbulbs. The guy that was there started dancing. Couldn’t help but watch. He caught me on the way down, so it’s fine!”

“What?” Suga said, setting down the plate of steaming food. “He _caught_ you?”

Ryuu set down the entire rice cooker on the table and took off the lid. “That’s really cool, and really stupid at the same time. How’s that guy?”

“He said he was fine. I bet he’s more bruised than I am, but he wouldn’t admit it.” Noya sat down, then felt like a brick fell on top of his head. “Ah fuck, I think I forgot to thank him.”

Suga eyed him across the table with a frown. “There’s tomorrow.” He let out a soft exhale. “Well, it’s good no one’s badly hurt. I think I still have an ice pack in the freezer.”

“It’s still there,” Ryuu said. “I used it last week when I was editing my thesis proposal.”

Noya raised his eyebrow. “You can use that for migraines?”

Ryuu shrugged. “I finished on time, so I guess so.” He reached over the table to shove Noya’s shoulder, which made him flinch. Guess it really was bruised. “Stop falling off of stuff, or getting into trouble, please?”

“It’s not like I _wanted_ to fall, dumbass!”

Suga cleared his throat loudly. He pushed Noya and Ryuu away by their foreheads. “For how long will you be at MSA anyway?”

“Until September.” Just the thought of it made Noya want to drive his head into the nearest wall. Suga gave a sympathetic smile. Ryuu scrunched his face, as if he was the one who had to go through it.

“Sucks, man,” Ryuu said.

“You’re telling me.”

“Did you start making friends yet or is that on tomorrows agenda?” Suga asked, switching topics. He was still picking at his bowl, barely halfway through it.

“Maybe,” Noya replied vaguely. “I don’t know. ”

“Well, you’ll never know,” Suga said as if in finality. “You might meet someone interesting.”

He said it with a sprinkling of hope, and Noya’s mind quickly wandered to Asahi. He remembered how the sunlight made his skin glow as he moved. How his hair fell across his eyes. His soft voice that didn’t seem to match his body.

“Okay, I need your bowls, I’m doing the dishes,” Ryuu said as he stood up.

That was enough to shift Noya’s attention. “No! I haven’t done any chores today - gimme!” He snatched the empty bowls away (Suga’s only partially empty, much to his and Ryuu’s displeasure) and headed for the sink. Ryuu shrugged and trailed after him.

Noya heard the quiet scrape of the chair. “I could help -“ Suga offered.

“No!” Noya and Ryuu said in unison.

“You can go ahead!” Ryuu continued, grabbing a plate and scrubbing at like it was the grimiest thing. In reality, the food residue came right off. “We got this.”

“You can just do breakfast tomorrow,” Noya added.

Noya could practically hear the hesitation in Suga’s silence. It lasted for only a few seconds, before he heard the chair creak.

“Thanks, you two,” Suga said, feet dragging against the floor. “I’ll go ahead and shower. Good night.”

“Night!”

Noya busied himself with rinsing whatever Ryuu washed, leaving it on the drying rack. They’d come back to it after everything was done. As soon as Noya heard the door to Suga’s room closed, Noya leaned towards Ryuu.

“How long is he going to keep this up?” he whispered.

Ryuu shook his head. “I don’t know. Did he say anything about going back?”

“No, nothing to me. You?”

“Nothing.” He handed Noya a bowl. “Well, it’s still early in the semester. He could come back mid-year if he wanted. Or even the next year. A leave of absence can go on for that long, right?”

“Think so,” Noya said. “But he’s better now, right? I mean…not the same, but he’s not -“

“As sad, yeah,” Ryuu agreed. “But you _know_ he wants to go back. And he hates his job.”

“Not that he’s ever going to admit it.”

“Psh, nah. Of course not.”

An 8-bit rendition of Power Rangers rang throughout the apartment. Ryuu instantly jumped in his place, soap suds flying about.

“Is it nine already?” Ryuu asked, his head whipping around for the clock. “Shit, did we forget to change the batteries again?”

“Probably,” Noya answered, lifting his wrist for his watch. “Yeah, it’s nine.”

“Ryuu! Your phone!” Suga called out from his room.

“Shit shit shit,” Ryuu muttered, moving about like someone hit the fast forward on him.

Noya laughed out loud. He bumped his hip against Ryuu’s so he could take his spot. “Just go, loser. I got this.”

Ryuu stopped and gave Noya an almost-weepy smile, but without the tears. “You are a saint, Noya.”

“I know, I know.” Noya took over the washing as Ryuu rinsed his hands at speed that rivaled lightning, wiping them on his jeans and bolting towards his room.

“Seriously,” Noya said to himself. He leaned away from the sink just as he heard Ryuu pick up the phone. Ryuu held the phone close to his ear, a familiar soft smile already on his face.

Suga waving from his spot in his room caught Noya’s eye. He pointed to the direction of Ryuu’s room, a playful (though now so rare) twinkle in his eye.

“Sap,” he mouthed. Noya snorted so loud that Ryuu shot him a pink-cheeked glare.

Noya knew that no matter what life threw at him, be it ludicrous hours of community service or bruises in any shape or form, he was going to be just fine. As long as he had his best friends, nothing would ever truly be horrible.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you're interested, I based the dance Asahi did on [this amazing cover](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c-tW0CkvdDI) of Take Me to Church!
> 
> Feel free to talk Asanoya/HQ with me on [Twitter](http://twitter.com/incendiarywit_) and/or [Tumblr](http://in-cendiarywit.tumblr.com)!


	2. Chapter 2

Noya was falling.

Well, he _felt_ like it at least. His body seemed suspended in the air, floating weightlessly in space and time. In reality, he was sitting perfectly still in the middle of an empty hallway. He had his eyes closed, and an arm over it to block most of the light reflecting off the linoleum.

Still, he felt like someone took his body and pushed it down a mountain. He had the bruises to prove it. He felt like he couldn’t stand up for another century.

“Five minutes,” he had mumbled to himself earlier as he stumbled up the fourth floor.

He was assigned to general cleaning duty again today, which he greatly preferred to cleaning bathrooms (which was his task yesterday and the day before. It left him dizzy all the way until he crashed into bed). The only issue was that it drained all the energy out of him, and left him feeling like an overcooked spaghetti noodle.

When he finally caught his breath, he wiped the sweat from his forehead with the hem of his shirt and stood up. General cleaning was almost mindless work, just like his classes and serving at the izakaya, allowing him to move on autopilot. Well, it _was_ autopilot until he finished the pottery room. Afterwards he lugged up his cleaning materials at top speed, leaving them in the empty room and with a knock, entered the dance studio.

Asahi was there, standing just a few meters away from the door. His body was angled towards the window, left arm stretched to the side and the right was curved in a graceful arc above his head. He immediately turned, his arms coming to rest to his sides, until he was facing the door.

“Noya, hi,” he said, lips curving into a smile.

“Hey, Asahi!” Noya greeted, a smile finding its way to his lips as well. Something small, but warm and bright bloomed in his chest. Asahi was _real_ and not a figment of his imagination. “You remembered me.”

“Ah…well.” Asahi’s hand found its way to the back of his neck, and he bowed his head shyly. “It was kind of hard not to.”

Noya felt his face turn warm in response. “Yeah. Guess I made a pretty memorable impression, huh?”

“You could say that,” Asahi said. “Are you okay now?”

“Yeah, yeah I’m great! I actually just wanted to thank you,” Noya said. “For catching me, I mean. I realized I didn’t get to, and it was horrible of me considering I probably bruised you in some places -“

“I’m fine, really,” Asahi said, before he hesitated. “I mean, my elbow is a bit…” He lifted it to show Noya the mottled purple there.

“Oh shit.” Noya walked over and stopped an arm’s length away from Asahi, bending closer to inspect it. “I’m really sorry.”

Asahi shook his head, lowering his arm. “Don’t worry, it’s nothing that won’t heal.”

“I’m still sorry, anyway,” Noya insisted. “I promise I’m not usually that clumsy.”

Asahi gave him a sympathetic look. “Please don’t be sorry, Noya. It’s really okay.”

Noya felt himself smile again. Was this guy for real? “Okay, Asahi. No more apologies from me.” That was enough to bring the smile back on Asahi’s face.

It was strange seeing him again, but Noya felt nothing if not glad. There was so much he failed to notice the first time they were together. The scruff on his chin, and the golden hue of his skin that glowed under sunshine that touched it. He wore an olive tank top today, which immediately drew Noya’s eyes to his muscular arms, and black sweatpants. His hair was all up in a neat ponytail, which emphasized his broad cheekbones. He was even more beautiful than Noya remembered.

“I wanted to come by earlier, actually,” Noya said as an attempt to return to his train of thought. He knew he was staring so obviously. “It shouldn’t have taken me this long to thank you.”

“It’s okay. I’m not usually here on Tuesdays and Wednesdays anyway.”

“Yeah, about that. Can I ask a question?”

“Sure.”

“I mean, I know this is an arts school and stuff, but you can’t be the only dancer here.”

“I’m not, I promise. There are about…” Asahi turned his eyes up to somewhere above Noya’s head. “Eight? Yeah, about eight other dancers in my year. Most of them just chose to stay in the basement with the freshmen.”

 _“What?”_ Noya said. “You mean the really musty room? With the rolling mirrors?” He remembered how rundown that room was compared to every other one he’s been to. “I didn’t know that was for dance!”

Asahi’s shoulders jumped, and Noya realized belatedly that his voice was too loud. “Yeah...not everyone knows about it.” Asahi continued anyway, before Noya could do or say anything. “Most of the dancers prefer the basement because it’s cooler.” He chuckled. “And they don’t have to climb eight flights of stairs.”

Noya tilted his head. “Then why are _you_ here? Don’t you wanna be with the other dancers?”

Asahi’s eyes widened in surprise. “Well...I come down to hang out on Tuesdays and Wednesdays,” he said. “And we go out for dinner sometimes. Everyone’s great.”

He turned his gaze to the open windows, the wind rustling through the tops of the trees, and his expression softened. “But…I like it here more. It’s quiet - but it’s not suffocating, if that makes sense? When I’m dancing here...my mind just shuts off. All I think about is moving, and I can actually feel the music in my body.”

He turned his gaze away from the window, and he looked sheepish all of a sudden. “I see them in class anyway, so it’s not like I miss much by having afternoons to myself.”

Noya didn’t understand much about the last part, but Asahi talking about dance resonated to him like a plucked guitar string, the echo bouncing against parts of his mind that was long left untouched.

“You know something, Asahi?” Asahi raised an eyebrow, waiting. “You’re really cool.”

“Ah?! W-well…” Asahi’s cheeks transitioned from a light pink to a bright red instantly. It contrasted brightly against his tanned skin. “I uh…I don’t know about cool -”

Noya couldn’t help but laugh, and he didn’t bother to hide it. “Asahi, you turned so red so fast! Did I embarrass you?”

Asahi cleared his throat, eyes darting away. “Embarrassed…maybe not the word I’d use.” He said quietly. “It’s just - you’re the first person to think I’m cool for spending time alone. My best friend thinks I enjoy it too much.”

Noya shrugged. “There’s nothing wrong with spending time by yourself,” he said easily. “One of my best friends is like that, too. Though honestly, it doesn’t benefit me all that much. I just get this loud buzzing in my head.”

“That’s me all the time,” Asahi said, sounding tired and slightly resigned to the fact. Noya was just about to ask why, when a loud, low electronic bell rang across the room, breaking his train of thought. Asahi looked up in surprise.

“That’s the bell,” Asahi said, eyeing a small set of speakers in the corner of the room. He looked back at Noya hesitantly. “I have to go. I’m meeting my teacher in a bit.”

“That’s okay.” Noya turned away and pulled back his sleeve to check his watch. “I - _shit_ , it’s four thirty.” Dread instantly filled his veins. He was already on rocky terms with the dean as it was. “I gotta start cleaning!”

“I took up your time,” Asahi said, guilt finding its way to his face, a crease appearing on his forehead. “I’m s -“

“You didn’t, so don’t apologize,” Noya countered immediately. “I just get distracted easily.” He did a quick survey of the room. By some small miracle, it was still a bit clean from when he last cleaned it. Shouldn’t take too long. “I better get started.”

Asahi gave him a sympathetic smile. “I won’t keep you.”

Noya brought in the dry mop and zipped across the room, while Asahi quickly gathered his things into his bag. Asahi gave him a tiny wave as he slung his bag over his shoulder, walking across the room. Noya paused his speed cleaning to watch him.

“Hey, Asahi?” Noya called out, just as Asahi approached the door frame.

Asahi stopped and turned around, his wide, brown eyes meeting Noya’s instantly. “Yeah?”

Noya ignored the fluttering in his stomach and threw whatever doubts he had out the window. “It was really nice, talking with you," he said, his voice pitched quieter and softer than he intended it to. “Will you be here tomorrow?”

Surprise flashed through Asahi’s eyes again. For a moment, Noya worried he sounded strange, or too eager. He’s been accused of such before, of being some variation of too much, and he hated that he felt he had to check now.

But then Asahi smiled that tiny smile, the same one from the first time they met. “Yeah,” he said as the lightness spread across his face. “I’ll be here.”

Noya let out a sigh of relief. “Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow!”

*

Noya’s shift at the restaurant was exhausting, despite it being the shortest one he has for the week. Balancing plates and shouting orders, combined with vacuuming and buffing floors, left him feeling like a pile of goo. He made it back to the apartment without incident, his eyes half open.

“‘M home,” he called out, words already slurring. He navigated the hall through his tiredness, then flopped face down on the couch. “Don’t wanna move.”

From the dining table, Noya heard a loud, unabashed snort that could only belong to Ryuu. The sound of typing ceased. “Whatever happened to the guy I knew that could dance for seven hours straight?”

Noya groaned, adjusting his position with minimal movement until he had his back against the cushions. The off-white ceiling of the living room greeted him, cracks and all. “I got old. Happens to the best of us. Also happens when you have two classes in the morning, spend five hours cleaning four floors in the afternoon, and another four on an evening shift.”

Ryuu cackled loudly. “Last I checked, I was older than you. And don’t even think about talking age to Suga. You know how he is.”

Noya chanced a peek at Ryuu. “The hair doesn’t help,” he said, lips quirking up at one of their many running jokes.

“Ha! That it doesn’t.” The sound of keys being pressed resumed.

Noya used one of his arms to push himself up slowly. He groaned all the way up as his tired muscles whined in protest. “I don’t know if I can do this community service thing,” he said as he angled his body towards his best friend.

Ryuu sighed, resting his arms on either side of his laptop. “Well good luck with that. It’s only been four days.”

“Yeah, of torture.” Noya rested his back against the couch, wincing at the movement. He wondered when he ceased to be able to move. “That’s twenty hours out of three hundred.”

“Six point seven percent is better than zero.”

Noya frowned, this time sitting up to fix Ryuu a look. “Your mental math skills will always freak me out a bit.”

Ryuu shrugged, a smug look on his face. The bastard. “Studying business does that to you. Can’t always have a calculator.”

Noya shook his head vehemently. “No, you were like that even in high school. You used to calculate each table’s bill whenever your cash register broke.”

“Only ‘cause Nee-san didn’t want to buy a new one!” Ryuu pressed his thumbs against his eyes, like the numbers were swimming in front of him right now.

“How is she, by the way?”

“Spending more time with Kanoka than I am.” Ryuu took his hands away from his face. “I think my family adopted her when I left.”

“Well, not hard to see why. She’s pretty great.” He hasn’t seen Kanoka, Ryuu’s girlfriend since third year, since he last went home. That was during the New Year, more than half a year ago now.

Ryuu’s expression melted into that dopey one he and Suga teased him for. His eyes were suddenly far away. “Yeah, she is.” 

Noya couldn’t help but snort. His best friend really was a sap. “Isn’t she visiting soon?”

“No,” Ryuu said, turning his gaze to Noya. The smile on his face was gone. “She’s got a couple of practice matches lined up.” He sighed heavily. “I wouldn’t have time, anyway, with this and all.” He sharply tapped the side of his laptop, like it just cursed at him.

Noya didn’t have to peer at Ryuu’s laptop to know what he was working on. All he’s heard of for months now was _thesis_. “Well, it’s the last hurdle to graduation. Just gotta get past that, and you’ll be on a one-way ticket home.”

 _“If_ I get past that,” A shadow of doubt fell across Ryuu’s face. “I barely scraped by with the proposal defense as it is.”

“You’ll get past it,” Noya said, projecting the confidence he felt for his best friend into his voice. “Knowing you, you’d probably ace it.”

Ryuu shook his head solemnly. “Let’s not ask for a miracle there, Noya. Don’t think I’m in the good books with any deity.”

Noya was just about to say that Ryuu was probably the only one _in_ the books, when the front door closed softly.

“Home!” Suga called out weakly.

“Welcome home!” Noya and Ryuu greeted, Noya’s more of a wheeze than anything. Suga appeared, giving them an exhausted smile. He dropped his bag on the floor and took the spot beside Noya on the couch.

“I don’t want to see a computer screen again,” Suga said as he rested his head on Noya’s shoulder. Noya winced, and Suga pulled back. “Sorry, was that the bruised one?”

“Yeah, but whatever it’s fine,” Noya said, and Suga slowly rested his head back on Noya’s shoulder. “What’d the computer screen do to you?”

“Torment me,” Suga replied. “Maybe getting an internship a good idea.”

“It wasn’t," Noya and Ryuu said together.

“Well, not the one you got anyway,” Ryuu continued, standing up. He closed his laptop and cradled it in one arm. “I’m going to finish this up in my room. Leave you two to talk.”

“Don’t stay up too late,” Suga told him, tiredly squinting his eyes at him.

Noya just snorted at Suga’s pathetic attempt at threatening. “I’ll wrestle you into bed if I have to,” he added.

Ryuu raised one hand up. “No, no, the tired glare is enough.” He left after successfully dodging a pillow to the face, but nearly dropped his laptop in the process. Noya and Suga howled in laughter, the sound loud enough to earn a knock from one of their neighbors. That just sent them into a silent but even more violent fit of laughter; one that had them clutching their stomachs and smacking whatever was nearest them.

“I’m not tired anymore,” Noya said after a particularly loud wheeze. Ryuu had left after his laptop nearly fell again, giving them an expression caught between hilarity and embarrassment.

“Neither am I.” Suga removed the hand that was covering his mouth, his top lip curled up so his teeth flashed. “Why do we always have moments like this? It’s _always_ like this!”

“It’s not a bad thing,” Noya said. Every corner of their apartment had at least three memories associated to it. The living room area alone, with their dark red couch (their first purchase from a thrift shop), low coffee table (that they’ve knocked their foot against several times), the small bookshelf (Suga’s personal books and Ryuu’s textbooks), and myriad of picture frames on the opposite wall was a witness to most of their life here.

He loved their place, and the people in it. And by the smile Suga had on his face, he seemed to be thinking along the same lines.

“No,” he said softly. “It isn’t. It’s how things have always been with us.”

“Yeah. I don’t think I can imagine life any other way.”

“Maybe less trouble,” Suga suggested gently.

“Hopefully.”

Suga’s smile cracked at the edges. “Well…what about when Ryuu graduates?”

This wasn’t a new concept to either of them. Ryuu was due for graduation in March, after - “If!” Ryuu kept insisting - he passed his thesis. That was why he worked so hard, taking most courses in advance so he could get home the soonest he could. When he left, it’d be the first time since they all met that they’d be away from each other, without knowing when the next time would be.

Noya frowned. Thinking about it always left him with a heavy feeling in his chest. One that pressed down hard, until he couldn’t breathe.

“I don’t know,” he said, because it was the only thing he was sure of. “Does it really matter? He’s still here. I mean…it’s still a long way off anyway.”

Suga sighed. “I guess you’re right. No use thinking about that now.”

They fell into silence, the remaining buzz from their laughing fit bleeding out of Noya’s system. He still felt exhausted, muscles sore and aching, but his mind was wide awake. So much that he could hear Suga’s quiet breathing beside him, and the muted press of keys all the way from Ryuu’s room down the hall.

“Did you see that dancer again?” Suga asked eventually. “You never told us his name.”

Noya let himself slide down on the couch a bit. “Asahi,” he said, letting the syllables roll of his tongue and marveling at the ease of it. “And yeah, I saw him. Finally.”

“Why finally?”

“They keep making me do different things at the school, so I didn’t have time. I cleaned bathrooms yesterday, you know.”

Suga’s nose wrinkled in distaste. “That’s just sad.”

“I think I can still smell the bleach.”

“That’s surprising, considering your bangs.”

Noya gave Suga a pointed look, one that he’s learned from the very person in front of him years ago. “You do know they use a different kind of bleach for that, right?”

Suga chuckled, and he reached forward to ruffle the bangs in question. “Whatever happened to the sweet thirteen year old I met? The one who used to scream ‘Suga-saaan!’ louder than a megaphone?”

“I realized you were part-devil,” Noya said. “And you’re the one who told us to stop calling you Suga-san. You never did tell us why.”

“I have my secrets that I will take to the grave,” Suga replied. “But Asahi, huh? I don’t think I ever had a classmate named Asahi. He must be a freshman. Or a transfer.”

“I don’t know, he looks a bit older than that. Maybe he’s my age?” Noya said. “I could always ask later. I’m seeing him again tomorrow.”

He turned to see Suga narrowing his eyes in suspicion, and he felt himself shrink slightly. “What?” he asked.

Suga shook his head. “So, what’s Asahi like?” he asked instead.

“Shy,” Noya settled. “It’s so…weird? Not a bad weird. It’s just that he’s so _confident_ when he dances, but when he talks his voice is so soft. He’s…” The image of Asahi’s tiny smile came to his mind. “He’s really interesting, Suga.”

The glint in Suga’s eye returned. “You’re smiling.”

“Am I?” Noya pressed his hand to the corner of his mouth and felt the rise at the corner.

“Something tells me there’s more to Asahi than you’re letting on.”

Broad shoulders. Wisps of brown hair. Tiny smiles. Those details, he kept to himself, though he didn’t really have a reason why. “I’m pretty sure I told you everything that happened.”

“Mhm.” Suga raised his eyebrow, voice clearly conveying that he didn’t believe a word of what Noya said.

“I really did!”

“Well, if you want to play it that way, fine.” Suga shrugged before settling back on the couch again, sighing as he did. Another silence settled between them again, punctuated by the distant sound of typing, until Suga spoke again.

“You know, I bet the studio looks the same. Especially in the afternoon, sunlight coming through the windows…and everything.”

Noya didn’t miss the wistful tone that Suga’s voice took, the way his shoulders slumped, and the faraway look in his eyes. He was probably picturing it in his mind, probably in more detail than Noya ever could.

“It does,” he replied, successfully toning his voice down for once. “Same black walls, too.”

“Is the room next to it still empty?”

“Yeah.”

Suga hummed, trying to sound light, but the frown on his face took over. “That’s nice,” he said. “To have things stay the same. It’s…comforting, somehow.”

Noya pressed his lips together, weighing the words in his mind for a second. That was better than his usual, which was blurting them out without passing them through a filter. And with Suga, he knew he had to tread carefully. “Did you think about coming back to MSA yet?”

Suga’s shoulders tensed, but he chuckled. “MSA?” he repeated.

“Machida School of the Arts is a mouthful.”

“If you say so.” Suga’s smile wavered until nothing of it was left, and uncertainty took over instead. “I…I’m not sure, Noya.”

“Well, do you _want_ to go back?” Noya asked.

“Can we please not talk about this?” Suga pleaded in a small voice, and Noya could see his bottom lip quiver.

Noya felt himself deflate even further. Things didn’t used to be this way. Suga used to be bright; a beacon, luminous with life and joy without being brash and boisterous like Ryuu and Noya tended to be. Of the three of them, he was always the most reserved, but by no means quiet.

Looking at him now, he still had half of what made him Suga. There was a storm cloud hanging above his head all the time, one that brought about quieter smiles and subdued laughter. It was like someone had pulled him roughly at the edges for far too long. Which, now that Noya considered it, wasn’t far from what happened.

“You keep doing this whenever we try to talk about it, you know. Don’t think me and Ryuu haven’t noticed,” Noya said as carefully as he knew how, which was probably still a scratch too harsh. “You can’t avoid it forever.”

Suga took this in quietly, staring at a spot on the bookshelf. Probably the digital clock, the lights glaring in electric green. “You know too much about me,” he said after a while. “I might have to kill you.”

Noya scoffed, seeing the diversion tactic clearly. “Ryuu will avenge me.”

“He’s still afraid of me, so he won’t.”

“Then we’ll both haunt you,” Noya resolved, before smirking. “Or! We’ll haunt the cheese tart guy to get him to avenge us.”

Suga let out a laugh that sounded a little hollow, but his cheeks turned pink all the same. “We are _not_ calling him the cheese tart guy, Noya.”

“Well, whatever,” Noya said. “You still haven’t asked him out, so he’s staying ‘the cheese tart guy’ until you do.”

“I will!” Suga insisted. “I just...haven’t had time.”

“But until then you’re going to exchange wordless smiles with this guy?”

“It’s not that and you know it!”

Noya let out a loud ‘tsk’ as he stood up. His entire body screamed in protest. “‘If you want to play it that way.’” He mocked with air quotes.

Suga crossed his arms in front of his chest. “Okay, smartass. I think you need to take your nap now.”

“One point for me, none for you,” Noya said, already padding towards his room. “Don’t stay up too late!”

“I won’t, I still have to check on Ryuu. And you know the tally is higher than that!”

“Two for me, then!”

Suga laughed out loud, and it sounded better, much lighter. It was better than nothing. “Good night!”

Noya closed the door to his room with a laugh, grabbing the nearest clean shirt and sweatpants. Looking at it now, reaching up to his mid-thigh, he wasn’t sure if the shirt was really his. His, Ryuu’s, and Suga’s laundry got mixed all the time, which was a source of a myriad of issues for all of them. Well, if it wasn’t his, one of his best friends would point it out eventually.

He shut off the lights, plunging the room into complete darkness, and crawled into bed. His muscles finally started to relax as he settled on the most comfortable position, lying on his stomach with his head turned to the side. He didn’t bother with a blanket, considering how hot it was getting. He’d just kick it off at some part of the night anyway.

Noya breathed in deeply, allowing the last of the somewhat cool air to enter his lungs. He allowed his mind to drift to something more pleasant, and instantly, his mind went back to the studio. He drifted into dreams muddled with music boxes bathed in sunlight and Asahi turning in slow motion.

*

Noya saw Asahi at the studio the next day, and the week after. It became a part of his routine now, no matter what task has been assigned - rather, sentenced - to him that day. He’d go up to the sun-lit studio even if his official shift was over, just to talk for a few minutes. It wasn’t hard to with Asahi, who talked with him effortlessly about whatever came up, who always seemed glad to see him. He always gave Noya a shy but genuine smile when he came in, one that left Noya’s insides feeling like he was hosting a butterfly garden.

Today, he just finished all the floors and left the top to last, when he heard music floating into the hallway and followed it to the source. The soft tones of the violin hit its crescendo, hanging on the high note, before fading into the background when Noya stepped into the empty room. The door to the studio was left slightly ajar.

He hastily left his cleaning supplies in a corner of the empty room and was about to push the door open, when he heard an unknown voice speak. It was small and soft, but still stern, enough to tell Noya the person was probably some authority figure. Maybe a teacher. He ventured as close and as silently as he could to the door, peering at the opening.

Asahi was there, but something was wrong. He stood in the center of the room, looking down at the teacher with a grave expression. Next to him, a small, slim man with messy black hair and large glasses made hand gestures as he spoke. His face was contorted in a soft frown.

“Your piece needs to be stronger than this, Azumane-kun,” he scolded, though not unkindly. “And I know you have the potential in you to get it to that level.”

Asahi looked sadder than Noya has ever seen him, head bent down. It made his stomach sink. “…I’m sorry,” he murmured.

The teacher sighed, his expression changing to something less stern. “I know you worked hard, you always do. I just...I feel like -“

“I can do better,” Asahi finished quietly.

The teacher gave Asahi a sympathetic smile. “I know you can. I’ll leave you to practice a bit more, give you a bit more time to come up with something. Please take my suggestions into consideration.”

“I…I’ll consider it well, sir.”

“Update me on your progress. Then we’ll schedule another meeting, okay?”

“I will, sir.”

He tried catching Asahi’s eye, then settled for a small sigh when he couldn’t. “It’s a good routine, Asahi. You’re one of our best dancers. Good routines just take time.”

Noya saw Asahi’s fist tense at his sides. “I know,” he replied, jaw tight.

The teacher made his way to the door, and Noya did a horrible job of rushing to grab the nearest cleaning tool - a mop, thankfully - and pretending to work. The teacher passed him, giving a nod as he made eye contact with Noya, before walking out of the empty room. Noya let out a loud sigh of relief as he rested his back against the nearest wall. It was too close, even for him.

He entered the studio once his heartbeat went back to normal. He found Asahi still in the middle of the room, standing as still as a statue. He stared hard at the floor, the sunlight touching the tips of his toes and glowing against his hair, turning it auburn. It is only after a minute of silence did he let out a sigh, turning his gaze to Noya.

No shy smile today, not that Noya expected one. Instead, Asahi looked like he wanted to crawl under the nearest closed space and hide. “So...I guess you heard that.”

“I didn’t mean to,” Noya said earnestly, slowly stepping into the room. “Rough day, huh?”

Asahi let out a wry laugh as he turned his gaze down to his feet. “Nothing that isn’t my fault.” 

“I’m sure that isn’t true,” Noya said, but Asahi just looked even more unsure.

The silence that now surrounded them made Noya’s shoulders stiffen. He wasn’t good at this, at comforting people, especially when he’s only known them for a little while. But the downturn of Asahi’s lips began to pull Noya’s stomach in a knot, and he knew he couldn’t leave Asahi feeling the way he did.

“Hey um,” Noya began, his mouth moving before his brain could catch up. That never usually led to anything good. “What was that about, back there anyway? I know - I wasn’t supposed to hear it, but you just seem really…upset about it,” he finished lamely.

Asahi looked up slowly, and Noya fully expected a guarded look, maybe even a slightly angry one. He knew it was too much to ask so early on. He’s about to tell Asahi _“Sorry for being nosy, you don’t have to tell me anything, we barely know each other."_ but to his surprise, Asahi looked at him curiously, almost sadly. It reminded Noya a lot of those wide-eyed animals in the videos Ryuu showed them. The ones that looked both curious and unsure before they took a bite of the treat offered to them.

Asahi seemed to be looking for something in Noya’s expression, his eyes roaming over Noya’s face. He either found it or didn’t, because he opened his mouth to speak.

“What you heard was pretty much all there was,” Asahi said, and Noya had to move closer to hear him. “It’s…supposed to be a routine I’m preparing for a major showcase. It’s - It’s not going well.” He wrinkled his nose. “Obviously.”

“Obviously,” Noya repeated, but in a kinder tone. He’s glad he’s learned that from Suga. “You can't come up with a new one?”

“I would if I could,” he said, looking lost. “It…takes me a long time to come up with routines. That’s why I wanted to start now, even if the showcase is in February.”

Noya blinked. “Wow, that’s a long time.”

“I know.” Asahi frowned, and Noya felt the urge to do something, _anything_ to get that expression away from his face.

“Well…your teacher was it?” Noya asked, to which Asahi nodded. “Okay, your teacher made some suggestions, right? You could start from there.”

Asahi grimaced. “It’s a bit more complicated than that, Noya.”

A loud knock interrupted their conversation, causing both of them to turn their attention to the door. A broad-shouldered man with close-cropped black hair entered, looking very confused expression when he saw Noya. He then turned his gaze to Asahi.

“I take it Takeda already dropped by?”

“He did. Hey, Daichi.” Asahi turned to Noya. “Noya, this is Daichi. Daichi, this is Noya, the guy I told you about.”

Noya felt his cheeks heat up. Daichi regarded him like he was just told Noya was some sort of celebrity. Or someone very famous for something very, very embarrassing. He knew it was the latter.

“The one you tried to catch last week?” Daichi clarified. “This is the guy?”

Asahi’s cheeks turned pink. “Well…yes,” he said, sounding very shy all of a sudden. It made Noya feel that there was a part of this conversation he lacked the details to.

Armed with this new knowledge, Daichi appraised Noya in a different way. Somehow his expression reminded Noya of a teacher he had back in high school. His English teacher, one that had a glare that could turn his blood to ice.

It quickly faded to something indiscernible, and Daichi shot Asahi a look. “I’m surprised you didn’t end up crushing him,” he said eventually.

 _“Wow,”_ Asahi said. “Thanks for the support.”

“I was the one who crushed him, if we’re being honest here,” Noya piped up, feeling a prickle of irritation. “I’m sorry about it.”

“Oh, hey it’s okay,” Daichi said immediately, holding his hand out in front of him, like he was physically stopping the thought. “I wasn’t blaming you. I was just pointing out that this guy over here didn’t really think it through.”

Noya felt his muscles relax. Beside him, Asahi sighed, like it was something he’s heard before. Probably more than once. “I’m fine, aren’t I?”

“You’re lucky you didn’t break your leg. Which would have been horrible and you would’ve have whined to death about not showing Takeda your routine. How’d that go, by the way?”

Noya watched as Asahi’s shoulders slumped again. “He wants me to redo it.”

“Again?” Daichi said.

“Again?” Noya repeated. “This isn’t the first time?”

“It’s the second one he’s rejected,” Asahi clarified to Noya gently, before turning to Daichi again. “He really wants me to make it a duet.”

Daichi let out a loud “Ahh” of understanding, accompanied by a face that suggested that a duet was the furthest thing from something good.

“Is that difficult?” Noya asked.

“He’s never done one before,” Daichi supplied, to which Asahi nodded miserably.

“I don’t even know where I’m going to get a partner this late.” Asahi pressed the heel of his palm against his eyes. “Everyone already has plans of their own.”

“Didn’t you say there were dancers in other years?” Noya asked.

Daichi nodded in agreement. “You could hold auditions,” he suggested. “The freshmen don’t have anything to do.”

Asahi removed his hands from his face, his lips pressed in a grim line. “They might not be ready. And you know what my routines are like.”

“You won’t know until you see it for yourself,” Daichi said, eyebrows tensed in thought. “If it helps...I’ll gather up whoever’s interested, then you can schedule the auditions whenever you’re free.”

This made Asahi let out a sigh of relief. He looked at Daichi gladly. “Thank you.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Daichi said, reaching out to shove Asahi. It wasn’t too heavy of a shove, but Asahi leaned away anyway. “All good now? I gotta get back to the studio.”

“Yeah, I’ll finish up here.” Asahi gave a smile filled with relief. “Thanks for checking on me.”

“Had to make sure you were alive,” Daichi said, already stepping towards the door. He turned to Noya. “It was nice meeting you, Noya.”

“You too!” Noya replied, waving as Daichi left the room. When he did, he turned back to Asahi, whose shoulders were already a little less tense than they were a while ago.

“Is he the best friend you told me about?” Noya asked.

“Yeah, Daichi’s the best friend,” Asahi said. “He spends most of his time teasing me, but other than that, he’s not so bad.”

“Yeah, not bad at all. He has this vibe, though,” Noya thought to the face Daichi made, the one that felt like laser eyes. “He’s kinda scary, isn’t he?”

Asahi chuckled. “Yeah, he gives that vibe off to everyone. What’s worse is he _knows_ , and he enjoys it too much.”

Noya thought of Suga, his faultless smile and eyes full of mischief. When he wasn’t sad, anyway. “My best friend Suga is like that too. Worse is that he looks so innocent - you’d never be able to accuse him of anything.”

Asahi looked slightly fearful, but the corners of his mouth quirked up. “They should never meet.”

“Agreed.”

A companionable sort of quiet settled into the room. Noya heard the wind rustle through the trees, and felt it dance gently across his skin as it breezed through the room. The sun shone brighter, illuminating the room at an intensity that was near-blinding. Some of the rays hit Asahi’s arm and shoulders. It turned his skin into gold. Noya noticed that he didn’t didn’t look as worn out and hopeless as he did earlier, and he felt himself grin.

“Things’ll be okay,” he said.

Asahi exhaled, and it sounded lighter already. “They will, hopefully,” he agreed. “Thank you - for listening earlier.”

“It’s nothing,” Noya said. “I, uh…better get back to cleaning again. Before the dean comes chasing after me. See you tomorrow?”

Asahi nodded, expression soft. “I’ll be right here.”

“Great.” Noya gave Asahi one last wave and headed for the door, already dreading clean-up and putting away the mops and vacuum.

“Noya?”

He turned, hand on the doorframe. “Hmm?”

Asahi bit his lip, hand immediately coming to the back of his neck. It was a habit, Noya realized. “You can come to the auditions, if - if you want,” he said. “To watch, that is. If you have the time. You can just drop by - you don’t have to be there for the whole thing.”

Noya couldn’t help but smile as Asahi tripped over his words. “You’re serious?” he asked.

Asahi looked like he was about to say something else, but thought better of it and nodded shyly. Something in Noya’s heart warmed, feeling like sunlight on his skin. The answer came easily to him, because he was sure of one thing - that he wanted to see Asahi again. Especially if Asahi wanted to see him.

“Yeah, okay,” he said. “I’ll be there. Just say when.”

Asahi smiled. “I will.”

Noya wanted to stay, but he glanced at his watch and knew he already spent way too much time here. He waved Asahi goodbye, and reiterated his promise to be there for the auditions. He hurriedly stepped back into the empty room and gathered his cleaning materials, kept them, clocked out, and walked out of the school.

The sun began making its descent down the sky. At the same time, the cicadas were already buzzing loudly in the trees of the park he cut through. Their song buzzed in Noya’s ears, and remained so even as he boarded the train to work.

He couldn’t help but think, just for a moment, that their song sounded something like a beginning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again to [hotaryu](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hotaryu/pseuds/hotaryu) for beta reading this chapter. <3 
> 
> If you guys have any questions about story details or even tips on how I can improve characterization (would honestly love to know), feel free to leave a comment here or on my [Twitter](http://twitter.com/incendiarywit_) and/or [Tumblr](http://in-cendiarywit.tumblr.com)!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait, and thank you for being patient! This chapter was particularly fun to write, and actually contains the first scene I ever wrote despite it being quite different from the first draft. Enjoy!

On the day of Asahi’s audition, Noya finished community service early.

It was a small mercy granted to him by the universe, considering the work he did two days before. Sweeping the leaves in the courtyard left his skin pink and sore, and every movement, even breathing, made some part of his body feel like it was on fire. It was worse than horrible. He would have preferred shitty tan lines than feeling like a fire ant bit him whenever Ryuu pinched his arm.

Then again, the universe was rarely ever on his side. It liked to play favourites, and he wasn’t on that list.

He half-hobbled up the stairs, letting out a grunt or curse every other step. He heard the crowd in the studio before he saw it, the buzz of voices growing to a cacophony of voices as he reached the fourth floor.

The sight from the door was already something, but now that he pushed the door into the studio, he had to let out an impressed chuckle. There were about ten or so people, maybe more. Each of them formed their own little groups, talking in a multitude of volumes. Some wore loose shirts over tights that stopped just above the ankles, while others opted for sleeveless tight-fitting tops and sweatpants rolled up to the knee. There was this energy in the air, zipping about like crackles of lightning, one that made Noya feel charged and ready to zoom around himself.

Asahi stood in front of the room, his back against the barre. He was talking to Daichi, all while his eyes darted around nervously. Despite the tension in his shoulders, he spoke to Daichi easily, no hesitation in his words even if Noya couldn't hear them. It made him feel strange, seeing that. He wanted to be on that level, too, to be someone who Asahi could be comfortable with. At whatever capacity Asahi would allow.

Daichi spotted Noya across the room, who immediately nudged Asahi with considerable force. Asahi rubbed his arm, but immediately turned his head, eyes immediately finding him. Noya took this as his cue to approach.

“Noya, hey.” Asahi breathed in relief, mouth forming a shy smile.

“Hey,” Noya said, then cleared his throat when his greeting cracked in more places than it should. Stupid voice box. He greeted Daichi with a nod and a friendly smile. “Hi. This is a lot of people.”

“I know.” Asahi’s eyes quickly scanned the crowd again, before looking at Daichi. "You said a couple of people."

Daichi chuckled low in his throat. "This _is_ a couple of people, Asahi."

"It's good, right?" Noya asked. "It means a lot of people were interested?"

"A lot of them were interested when I pitched it to them, actually," Daichi said. "which Asahi would have known if he _just asked_."

Asahi ducked his head. "Well...at least we know now?"

"That's true," Noya said, before looking to the crowd again. "These are all freshmen?"

"Some are in my year," Asahi said. "well, our year, actually." His eyes narrowed, and Noya followed his line of sight to a dark-haired boy with a rather bored expression. "Is that...?"

"Yep." Daichi looked all too pleased with himself. "So the next grocery bill is on you. It was pretty hard to convince him to come."

Asahi let out a little sigh. "Thank you," he said. "Then again, I would have to do that, anyway. I thought it was my turn this month?"

Noya looked between the two of them. "Grocery bill?"

"I live with this goofball," Daichi replied easily, going for another shove that Asahi managed to dodge.

“You make it sound so...troublesome.”

“I’m the one who maintains order. That’s a pretty big thing.”

"I think you would have starved without me at some point," Asahi retaliated.

Daichi raised his hands in defeat. " _Fine,_ you win this time," he said. "I'll gather everyone up. You ready?"

Asahi seemed to remember the situation at hand, and Noya watched his shoulders lock in again. His eyes scanned the room one more time, like he was slowly taking in everyone's face, naming them in his head, before he nodded once. "Yeah, I think so."

Daichi reached out and clapped him on the shoulder. "It'll be fine," he said, before setting out to the center of the room.

Noya watched him go, before turning to Asahi. "The worst?"

Asahi made a face. "You could say that," he said. "Thank you for coming, by the way. I know you're busy."

Noya grinned, and felt amazed at how easy it was to do so. "It's not a problem, don't worry."

"Okay everyone!" Noya and Asahi both directed their attention to Daichi, whose voice echoed against the walls of the studio. The buzz of conversation dimmed considerably. "We're going to start in a bit."

Noya turned back to Asahi. "I'll go watch from the back," he said. "Let you do your thing."

Asahi nodded, giving one last smile, and Noya made his way to the back of the room. Everyone gathered around Daichi, who spoke to everyone with ease.

“...The routine isn’t fully polished yet,” Daichi continued. “but it has a fair amount of turns, which is Asahi’s usual style. We’ll try a few lifts, then maybe a bit of choreography, okay? Keiji, how about we start with you? I'll let Asahi take over from here."

Everyone but a boy with messy black hair and a sleepy expression sat down. Asahi moved one side of the room and the boy to the other, while Daichi moved to the back towards Noya.

"He's nervous," Noya said, watching Asahi instruct the boy in a voice too soft for him to make out the words.

"Oh he's beyond nervous. It took forever for me to convince him to get here," Daichi replied. "He needs a good partner - it's half his final grade for his major."

Noya winced in sympathy. "Ouch," he said. "Is that how things usually are around here?"

Daichi shrugged his shoulders. "More or less. It's harsh, but we all pull through somehow. We have to."

That didn't make sense to Noya. "All for what?"

Daichi's expression shifted, like Noya just issued him a challenge. "To reach our dreams, of course."

It should have sounded like the cheesiest thing in the world, maybe even a little childish. After all, everyone here was in their 20s, at least. Dreams were things you had as a kid, things that faded with the growing awareness of how harsh the world really was.

Yet Daichi didn't look or sound like he was joking at all. He said it as if it were common sense. There was this set of determination in his eyes, and he seemed to emit the same electricity that everyone else did when Noya walked into the room not long ago. The same ferocity that Asahi had on the first day Noya met him.

"That's..."  _Intense_ , he wanted to say. He didn't know any other word for it.

"It's something," Daichi completed for him, and then a friendly smile returned. "But that's not the only reason Asahi was nervous. He's kind of a wreck with new people."

Noya tilted his head. "What do you mean?"

"He says he's 'horribly awkward' - or something like that. That he never knows what to say. Honestly, he's been like that as far as I can remember. It takes him awhile to get comfortable."

That didn't clear up anything for Noya at all. "For real? He was fine with me. Other than the falling off the ladder part, I mean."

Daichi smiled, like he had a secret. “You have a unique talent then, Noya.”

Noya felt something in his chest then, settling in his stomach comfortably. He had to press his lips together to keep the wide smile from taking over his face. By the time their attention returned to the dancers, a short-haired blonde girl was on the other side of the room.

“Just run up to me and jump, okay?” Asahi instructed in a gentle voice. “We can try the more complicated lifts later.”

The girl twitched nervously, but nodded and broke into a run. Noya saw the error before he could so much as yell out a warning. Somehow she put too much strength into her leap, because Asahi staggered to catch her, arms scrambling to keep her from falling.

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” The girl squeaked once Asahi puts her down, looking mortified.

“It’s okay!” Asahi says automatically, red in the face.

"That's not good," Noya commented, keeping his voice low.

Daichi sucked in a breath through his teeth. "Not good at all," he agreed.

The succeeding dancers don’t fare any better. One of them, a timid-looking guy with a small, friendly smile keeps messing up his runs for the leap. A tall brunette kept asking to repeat the steps when they got to the choreography. An ash blonde with dark tips crashed right into Asahi when they turned, causing both of them to fall over.

“Oh god, that looks painful,” Daichi said, face contorted in both empathy for pain as well as concern.

Noya winced. “It probably was.”

Overall, it’s almost painful to keep on watching. Noya appreciated the talent that Asahi had, and understood why Asahi was so adamant to ask the underclassmen to audition. It wasn’t that they were bad; they outranked Noya by several tiers. They just didn’t sync well with Asahi. Too slow, too quick, too sharp, too soft - some form of too much and not enough all at once.

The last dancer finally took her leave, closing the door behind her, and Asahi slumped to the floor, his lips in a seemingly permanent frown. Daichi sighed from beside Noya and made his way towards his friend.

“I’m sorry, man,” Daichi said in a softer voice. “I really thought they could do it.”

Asahi shrugged, sighing like all the fight had gone out of him. “It’s fine. Thanks for trying anyway.”

Daichi placed his hand on Asahi’s shoulder. “I’ll get us some food from the store down the street. Want anything?”

Asahi shook his head. “I’m fine.”

“I’ll be at the studio then.”

“Yeah, okay.”

Noya frowned at the exhaustion and hopelessness in Asahi’s voice. Daichi caught his eye across the room, nodding his head towards Asahi, before clapping Asahi’s shoulder one last time and leaving him and Noya alone.

Asahi didn't look at him for a long time; he continued to stare at the floor like it would either show him mercy by swallowing him up or give him the answers he needed. Maybe both. Noya wanted to say something, but whatever measly words he had prepared were stuck in his throat.

"I don't know why this is so hard," Asahi said quietly.

Noya felt his heart sink all the way to his feet. He stepped forward slowly. "It's just a rough patch,” he said softly, treading carefully. “Someone better will turn up eventually."

"It's not just that." Asahi sighed, pulling his knees to his chest. "It's been a rough patch for two months now. I just...I just want to catch a break. Have things work out for once."

"They’ll work out," Noya insisted. He stopped in front of Asahi and knelt on the floor, without getting into Asahi’s space. “Asahi, you gotta believe that it will. Someone out there who’s as great as you is gonna show up - and you’re gonna come up with a routine that’s going to blow everyone’s minds. It just - I don’t know...takes some time.”

Asahi looked up at Noya from under his eyelashes, and his eyes were glassy. “I don’t know if I’m great,” he said.

That was something Noya couldn’t let slip. “You are!”

“But I’m not, Noya,” Asahi said, frustration seeping into his voice. He released his vice grip on his knees and rested his hands on his lap. “I know that - you see me practice all the time. But that’s so I can catch up to everyone _here_. The pressure is... _insane_ , sometimes I feel like I’m drowning in it. I need this partner, I need this routine to be good enough, but I don’t know if I have enough talent to get there.”

Noya could feel the emotions bubbling to the surface, but he didn’t have the words anymore. All he had was a stomach that twisted in a knot, one that tightened further when he saw Asahi’s hands shake even as they lay still on his thighs. He felt his own hands clutch at air, desperate to grasp something that would change the tide.

Asahi laughed wryly, a crooked smile on his face. "I'm sorry for this," he said, and Noya heard the little breaks in his voice. He used the back of his palm to scrub at his eyes. "I'm not always this...pathetic."

It dawned on Noya how Asahi had interpreted his silence. "You're not pathetic at all!" Noya exclaimed, surprising him and Asahi both. He leaned back, sitting on his heels, and tried again in a quieter voice.

"Asahi, there's nothing wrong with feeling the way you do. Just...don’t sell yourself short. Seriously, I’ve watched you for two weeks now and you’re one of the best dancers I’ve ever seen. And I’ve seen a lot of dancers.”

Asahi stayed still, and the only indication that he heard Noya was the tiny hitch of his breath at the end of Noya’s speech. His grip on his knees loosened, and he let out a quiet sigh.

“That’s really nice of you to think, Noya,” Asahi finally replied. His eyes flitted to Noya, but then quickly turned back to his knees. “Though I’m not sure I can believe all that.”

Noya wanted to rip his hair out - it wasn’t _fair._ None of this was even Asahi’s fault. Bad luck and horrible things should happen to people like Noya, not someone who had so much talent and passion and kindness and _dreams_ , things people just didn’t have anymore these days. People like Asahi shouldn’t have to feel this way. He’s seen enough of it in his own life to let it plague anyone else.

He’d realize later on that it was an extreme reaction to someone he was just starting to get to know. But now, Noya didn’t need to know everything about Asahi to see how much this meant to him.

“Try me,” he said. Where did that come from?

Next to Noya, Asahi blinked. “Huh?”

“I could do it.”  _What?_ Someone was in control of Noya’s voice, and it definitely wasn’t him. “I was watching the entire thing, just teach me. You could probably lift me, can’t you?”

Asahi regarded Noya like he turned into the sphinx and started spouting riddles. “What are you saying?”

Noya slowly pushed himself up, and shoved the tiny voice in his mind panicking about this being a bad idea into a corner. There was no point taking it back now. “I don’t know much about contemporary dance, but I think I could try. It doesn’t look impossible.”

Asahi’s eyes widened, the message finally catching up to him. He opened his mouth, then closed it, before trying again. “But Noya…can you dance?”

That sparked something in Noya, like a lighter finally getting it’s flame. Thrill flicked him in the chest before spreading through his body like wildfire. He felt his mouth curl into a smirk.

“Yeah I can,” Noya said with a lot more confidence than he thought he had. “I did street dance back in high school. I know it’s like…not the same thing, but I wasn’t half bad, and I don’t think you can afford to be picky at this point.”

He watched several expressions flicker on Asahi’s face before being replaced by another. Confusion between his eyebrows. Apprehension in his mouth. Hesitance everywhere else. Then everything suddenly molded into something fiery and dark.

“Is this a joke?” he asked, and Noya heard the drop of irritation in his voice like a blaring siren. “Are you making fun of me?”

That confidence shrunk like a popped balloon. “No! No, I - I’m not! Asahi, I’m not that kind of person. I’m being a hundred and ten percent serious here.”

Asahi watched him for a few seconds, before all the fire in his eyes drained out with a sigh. “I’m sorry,” he said in a softer voice. “I didn’t mean to snap at you.”

“It’s fine,” Noya said with a dismissing wave, but he felt his chest decompress anyway. “How about we just do it for fun? To take your mind off things?”

“For fun?” Asahi repeated. “You’re not...scared of me dropping you?”

Noya shrugged. “Not really,” he replied. “I fell off a ladder and I survived. And hey, if you _do_ drop me, I bet I could skip out on my hours.”

The corners of Asahi’s mouth twitch in what could be a smile. “That’s not encouraging at all,” he said. He used his arms to slowly push himself off the floor, until he could gain his footing. “Okay, let’s try it. For fun.”

Noya smiled, putting one foot out in front of him and getting off the floor. “Yeah?”

Asahi nodded, even if he gave Noya a forced smile. “One try. A serious one.”

“A serious try, but for fun?” Noya said, slowly stepping backwards. “I guess you don’t do things in halves, huh?”

“I don’t know how to do things in halves, really.”

Noya let out a laugh. “Then you and I are a lot alike.”

“I don’t know about that.” Asahi made a step forward, but Noya took two steps back. That made him stop. “Noya, what are you doing?”

Noya felt the wall against his back, and he grinned. “Catch me!”

He threw himself into a full on run, bolting in Asahi’s direction. He caught the look of horror on Asahi’s face, but he didn’t think of anything else as he jumped into the air, right in front of him.

By some miracle - or Asahi’s dance training, really - he feels strong hands grip at his waist as he’s lifted into the air. His eyes were at the level of the arch of the door, high enough to see the tops of the trees outside the window.

“Hey, you did it!” Noya cheered, raising a fist in the air. He looked down to see Asahi even more scared than before, beads of sweat dotting his hairline.

“You freaked me out!” Asahi exclaimed in reply, spinning Noya around slowly with the leftover momentum from the lift. “You could’ve…counted at least - !“

“I warned you, that’s pretty close.”

“I didn’t have enough time to process that!”

“But you still did it, didn’t ya?”

“I - well. I guess so.”

Asahi gave a pleased smile then edged with disbelief. His grip around Noya’s hips tightened, and something in his stomach jumped. Before he had the time to figure out what that was, Asahi stopped to slowly put Noya back on his feet.

It was probably nothing, Noya quickly resolved to himself. Adrenaline, or something similar. He turned his gaze to Asahi and smiled up at him. “Was that so bad?”

Asahi shook his head, and he let out a shaky laugh, clutching his chest. “Maybe a little more warning next time? I think my heart stopped.”

“I _did_ warn you,” Noya said. “Good thing you have fast reflexes.”

“Please...don’t count on my reflexes. They’re above average at best.”

“We’ll test it out more!”

“Noya, _no._ ” Asahi’s eyes were wide as if he were already imagining it, but he was still laughing.

The sunlight started losing its intensity, dulling down to something less blinding while still bathing the room in yellow. Noya saw the light of it bounce off Asahi’s collarbones, his smile appearing even brighter than it was. Noya could feel his heartbeat racing in his chest, and he felt like he was still spinning in the air. Still the adrenaline, he told himself.

They settled back into silence when Noya finally noticed one small detail. He looked down at his waist, where Asahi’s hands still rested, large and warm even through Noya’s shirt.

“Uh...” He hated the tiny squeak in his voice. He didn’t _squeak_. “You’re still holding me.”

Asahi raised his eyebrow, and his eyes wandered to Noya’s waist. “Oh.” Asahi’s hands slipped from Noya’s waist, returning to his sides. He gave Noya a sheepish smile. “Sorry.”

“It’s fine,” Noya said, ignoring the sudden chill that seemed to come out of nowhere. “So! Feeling better?” Asahi gave a slight nod. “Great. Now c’mon, teach me that choreography from earlier. What was that thing at the end?”

“Why didn’t you ever mention that you danced?” Asahi asked in return.

Noya’s eye twitched, and a practiced smile made its way to his face. He didn’t mention that he didn’t really tell anyone that these days. Or much of anything related to dance.

“Well, you never asked,” he said instead. “I’m a bit rusty though, so you’ll have to slow it down for me. How does the start go?”

“Oh, uhm, it’s pretty simple. It starts like this -” Asahi set his feet parallel to his shoulders, and slowly stretched his arms out, like he was pushing an invisible box in front of him. “- and then just tiptoe, bend your knees, then slide down."

“Slow down there for a second,” Noya said, holding out a hand in front of him. Everything happened in a blink of an eye, and Asahi made everything flow together like water down a stream.

Asahi sat back on his heels, looking up at Noya. “That was slowed.”

“Oh." The gears in Noya’s brain creaked, slowly and jerkily moving to try to keep up. His movements, when he tried to copy Asahi, worked pretty much the same way. Push out the arms, bend the knees...wait.

“Like that?” He asked with one arm on the floor, already knowing it was wrong.

"That was good," Asahi gave a patient smile, though the creases around his mouth said otherwise. "You just forgot the tiptoe. Do you want me to show you again?"

"Please," Noya said, pushing himself off the floor and getting back on his feet again. All his joints creaked from lack of use; he rolled his shoulders to get some of it to stop. "Okay, so from the push."

Asahi repeated the moves, instructing gently while Noya focused hard, slowly breaking the moves down in his head.

"Okay, I think I got it. Watch me to check if it's right." Noya stepped to the side of Asahi. "Push - then that, knees, and then slide." He slid his arm down on the floor, the ridges of the wooden floors bumping against his skin.

"That's better!" Asahi said, and he seemed to be genuinely pleased by this. He knelt on the floor, mimicking Noya's position. "From here, you extend your right leg back, and then use it to..."

Whatever explanation passed by Noya like a breeze. He watched as Asahi went into a lunge, pushing against the floor with his palms. He then he sat down, extending his leg up and using it to turn his body to the left, drawing half a circle into the air.

Asahi turned back to Noya and shrank a little into himself, as if he didn't just look like a cat stretching its legs in that way they do, full of grace and like their body weighed nothing. “What the - you never did that during your practice! That was amazing!”

"It's just a leg extension, then a slow turn," Asahi said, as if he were reading an instruction manual for building blocks. He still turned pink in the cheeks at the comment. "If it's too hard, you don't have to -"

"No, no, I didn't say that," Noya said, laying down on his stomach and moving closer to Asahi. "I just need to see it again, and don't kick my face."

"Did I - ? I’m sorry!”

"No, no, it’s just in case!" Noya scooted away from Asahi to make room, until the distance between them minimized any form of collision. "We really don't need another incident like the ladder."

"That - it would be ideal, yes," Asahi said, sitting on his heels again, before jumping to attention. "Not to have a repeat, I mean!"

Noya chuckled. "I know what you meant, Asahi. You don't seem like the kind of guy to give out death wishes."

"Definitely not." Asahi adjusted his position again. "Ready?"

Noya felt himself grin, his face muscles easily complying. "Ready!"

The succeeding moves came easier to him, his body finally warmed up and his mind picking up each curve of the arms, each step faster than the last. Every stretch of his limbs felt so new, but held a familiarity that pulled him back to dimly lit, low-ceilinged studios. Sneakers squeaking against hardwood. Hours upon hours of surrendering his body to his instincts, to the movements only his eyes could follow, until his shirt stuck to his skin and exhaustion bled through his pores.

Noya could feel that electricity in his veins again, the same kind that charged the room earlier with all the other dancers. Time faded between them, seconds and minutes turning into several counts and eighths, into breaths growing heavy with exertion.

They were both standing when it was over, having just executed a turn that Noya definitely overdid. He caught his reflection in the mirror - his bangs plastered to his forehead and the collar of his shirt darker than the rest. Asahi didn’t look any better, with the entire front of his shirt drenched and sticking to his chest. Which...Noya might have stared at for a second longer than he should have.

"How was that?" Noya asked eventually, turning away from the mirror and to Asahi beside him.

"Great, it was...really great, actually." Asahi’s expression softened, shoulders releasing whatever tension they carried from earlier. He looked exhausted, considering he danced a ton today, but he looked relieved. And maybe a little more at peace. "Thank you Noya - for doing this."

"Hey, it's nothing." Noya gave Asahi a smile; something to reflect the fluffy, light feeling that began to take residence in him when Asahi directed that softness at him. "I had fun. I haven't actually danced in..." He trailed off, racking his brain for the answer. He came up at a blank, the emptiness staring back at him in a way that was off-putting.

"I don't actually remember," he said finally, after what must have been longer than normal, if the crease above Asahi's brow was anything to go by. For a second, he felt a painful buzz in his chest, but he quickly squashed it down with a smile in Asahi's direction.

"Doesn't matter. The point is, I should be thanking _you_. I forgot how much I actually liked this, even if it wasn't street dance."

“Even if it wasn’t street dance?” Asahi repeated with an amused smile.

“Fine, I was a dance snob! I only ever tried street, okay?” Noya found himself chuckling at his own immaturity. “So this was...really nice, is what I’m trying to say. A good change.”

“I’m glad it worked for both of us, then.”

A tiny chirp of the phone sounded from the front of the room, where Asahi’s bag was. Asahi made a vague motion in that direction, which Noya responded with a ‘Just go’ and another chuckle. He busied himself with wiping his face with whatever part of his shirt was left dry, trying not to look like he just got a bucket of water thrown at him.

Noya heard words his mind did not catch. He pulled the bottom of his shirt away from his face. “What was that?”

Asahi had a half-filled water bottle in his hands. “I said you were really good,” he replied. “Considering you’ve been out of practice. You copied everything I taught you in no time.”

“I used to be quicker,” Noya said. “I don’t know - it’s pretty easy for me, usually. I can just turn my mind off and my eyes just do everything else.”

Asahi looked amazed by this. “That sounds really useful. I take forever to learn choreography.”

“So you make your own?”

“It’s a perk of it.”

Noya felt a smile on his face. "Let's just hope whoever you get partnered with is just as quick with choreography, yeah?"

Asahi stopped, expression frozen mid-sentence, like someone just whispered something important into his ear. His hand hovered over his water bottle, the little white cap even tinier between his fingers.

"Asahi?"

This brought him back to earth from wherever he came from. Asahi turned back to Noya. "It's...no, it's nothing."

Noya stepped forward, towards the mirrors. "Didn't look like nothing. I thought you got possessed or something."

"Possessed?" he repeated, then shook his head. "No, it's nothing like that."

Noya stepped closer. "But it's something, right?"

Asahi took a bit of his lip between his teeth, and Noya's eyes tracked the movement. A clear nervous habit, he knew that at least. Ryuu did it. Suga did it. Heck, even his younger siblings did. He felt the impatience thrum through his veins like a rabbit stomping its feet, and he spoke before he realized he should have waited.

"Hey, what is it? Can't be that big."

With the way Asahi looked right now, it _did_ seem pretty big; almost like he was weighing the fate of the world. Noya didn’t really understand that himself, considering how his impulsiveness made all the decisions for him. Some things, he believed, were simpler than everyone thought them to be.

Whatever debate happened in Asahi's mind seemed to reach its conclusion, because he looked back at Noya with his jaw set and no traces of doubt in his eyes. All that was left was a fiery determination that Noya was slowly becoming familiar with, one that made his stomach flip more than once.

Asahi reached out and wrapped his large hand around Noya's wrist, his grip unexpectedly gentle. Noya felt equal parts afraid and exhilarated.

"Follow me," was all Asahi said before he led Noya out the door.

*

Noya was correct to feel afraid, as it turned out. The exhilaration drained out as soon as they stepped foot into the faculty room.

They were in one of the conference rooms now, with Asahi to his right and Takeda in front of them. He looked even smaller now than Noya remembered, and his frown grew progressively the more Asahi spoke.

“Are you sure about this?” Takeda asked, hands clasped together in front of him. “Surely there are other dancers.”

“I’ve auditioned all the freshmen who were interested,” Asahi said, on the edge of his seat. “None of them can handle it. All the other sophomores have their own routines.”

“And there’s no one else who can do it?”

“No one else who’s willing.” Asahi turned in Noya’s direction. “Noya - I mean, Nishinoya has some background, and I’ve seen him dance. It’s enough.”

Takeda sighed. “Asahi-kun…I’m not sure if the dean would approve. He has hours to keep, after all.”

Noya watched their exchange like it was a table tennis match - thoughts flying back and forth almost without end. He could barely catch up with what was going on. He was a kid at a boardroom meeting, at this point.

“He can use those hours to practice with me instead,” Asahi proposed.

“That’s what I’m afraid of,” Takeda said, leaning forward. “It will be your responsibility, Asahi. I’m just wary that this might hinder your progress later on.”

“Nishinoya won’t. I’ll make sure he comes in every time he needs to.”

“Hold on hold on,” Noya said, placing a hand on Asahi’s arm. He finally caught up, and the unwavering confidence in Asahi’s voice just became a lead weight in his stomach. “You want _me_ to be your partner?”

“You haven’t discussed this with him?” Takeda asked, slightly alarmed.

“You guys make this sound so serious,” Noya said, trying to diffuse the growing tension in the room.

“Because this _is_ serious, Nishinoya-kun.” Takeda directed an intense stare at Noya, and he felt like he was in high school all over again. Young and in trouble almost monthly. “It’s not just about talent or passion. The students at this school work themselves to the bone to get at least one step closer to their dreams - Asahi is no different. We need someone who can show the same dedication.”

“He can do it,” Asahi said automatically.

Noya had several thoughts attack him at once, and he couldn’t latch on to any of them. Asahi was going a bit crazy at this point. He had to be if he was considering _Noya_ of all people to do this with him. That lead weight was starting to feel heavier and heavier by the minute.

“How can you be so sure about me?” Noya asked, which probably didn’t help to assure Takeda in the least. Asahi - well. Noya wasn’t sure if he was really listening. He still had that determined set to his eyes that was difficult to ignore.

“Did you mean it?” Asahi asked instead.

“Mean what?”

“When you told me you could try - before you said it was for fun,” Asahi clarified. “Did you mean that, or were you just joking?”

Under Asahi’s gaze, Noya felt like he had a spotlight above his head. He exhaled. “Yeah, I did,” he said almost solemnly.

“Then that’s all I need.” Asahi grabbed one of Noya’s hands in his and moved his face closer until they were inches away from each other. Noya heard a small squeak from Takeda’s side of the room. “If I find someone who can do it, then I won’t ask you to stay on. Whatever you don’t understand, I’ll teach you. I’ll do anything just... _please_ , Noya.”

Noya bit his lip, the weight in his stomach impossibly heavy now, and he decided in the span of two seconds. “Okay, I’ll do it.”

Asahi sighed and smiled widely with relief. Noya knew in that moment that he wanted to see that expression on Asahi’s face happen because of him again. “Oh thank god -“

“The name is Nishinoya, but go on.”

Asahi laughed, loud but still gentle and bright, and Noya decided immediately that he needed _that_ to happen again, too. “We’ll start on Friday, then.”

“We expect you to show up to practices on time,” Takeda piped up, turning stern again. Noya shrank a little in his seat, but not as much as Asahi did. Whatever ferocity existed earlier faded, and he was back to being Asahi, slouch and shyness and all.

“Asahi-kun, I expect you to report to either me or the dean if anything happens.” Takeda added.

Noya bristled a bit at that, but Asahi didn’t waver. “I will,” he said.

Takeda sighed. “Well, I hope this turns out well. This could be just what your piece needs,” he said. “You both may go.”

They shuffled out of the faculty room as quietly and as quickly as they could, wading back into the busy halls. Noya allowed Asahi to lead, the crowd parting for him easily.

“Thank you so much for doing this,” Asahi said, stopping at the foot of the staircase. “I promise, it’ll be worth it.”

Noya already felt like it was, with the way Asahi was looking at him. “I’ll try my best,” he replied earnestly. “I won’t let you down. So, tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow, same time your shift starts,” Asahi confirmed. “I’ll be at the studio a bit earlier than that. Thank you again, _so_ much.”

“I got it the first few times, don’t worry.”

They waved goodbye, Noya watching as Asahi climbed up the stairs with a bit more spring in his step. He bumped into someone on the way, and he ducked and bowed in apology. Noya didn’t bother to hide his laugh.

“Careful!” Noya called out.

“Trying!” Asahi called back, slowly weaving through the last flight of stairs. “Don’t forget to bring your tights!” he said as parting words, before he disappeared into the next floor.

Noya still has his hand up, students turning to avoid him, when the gravity of everything came crashing down. “Wait, _what_?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to [hotaryu](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hotaryu/pseuds/hotaryu) as always for beta reading and working out details and arcs with me. Thank you as well to [Arghnon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arghnon/pseuds/Arghnon) for checking to make sure I did not stray too far in terms of characterization. ❤
> 
> Feel free to chat with me on [Twitter](http://twitter.com/incendiarywit_) and/or [Tumblr](http://in-cendiarywit.tumblr.com)! I promise I don't bite, and I'm more active on those two platforms anyway!
> 
> Thanks for reading! ヽ(*⌒∇⌒*)ﾉ


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for waiting for this chapter! Life has been quite rough lately, plus I got sidetracked with [this Our Times/rough 90s high school AU](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12185853/chapters/27664944) (go check it out if you'd like!) and frustrated over plot for this, as I do. But I've figured everything out and here we are! This chapter is a bit long, so hopefully that makes up for it!
> 
> Again, if you have any questions about any part of this fic or would just like to flail about Asanoya, feel free to shoot me a comment here or message me on [Tumblr](http://in-cendiarywit.tumblr.com). 
> 
> Hope you enjoy! (*´∀｀*)ノ~☆

Noya was finally on his way home, pushing the main doors of MSA, rushing out into the courtyard and down the street. His body and mind felt awake and alive, like he had a cup of coffee. Or any form of caffeine, really. He never really needed caffeine considering his unwavering energy levels, but the times he did always felt awake and alive.

 _Alive._ It was a strange word, one he never used to dawdle in for too long. He thought being alive just meant waking up everyday and doing what you had to do. He thought alive just meant something as simple as breathing. Now he was starting to understand that it felt like this, like a thousand paper airplanes zipping about at once, and that he forgot the feeling a long time ago. He didn’t even realize that he forgot, and at what point in his life did he allow himself to.

The movement of the train didn’t help either. He felt too wired to sit still, eyes darting about as the world moved around him. He earned several glares as he tapped his fingers against the wall of the train car, and he curled his fingers into a fist to make himself stop. It’s was strange feeling somehow; Noya felt it from his head to his toes, and he didn’t really know what to do with himself. He realized as he got off the train that what he was feeling was excitement. 

All things considered, Noya never imagined his first time dancing since high school leading to this _._ To slightly aching limbs, to sweat drying on his back, to a promise to dance for and _with_ someone else. 

 _“Don’t forget to bring tights!”_ Asahi called out, his bright smile flashing in Noya’s mind. Where Noya was going to procure tights, he didn’t know. He realized it didn’t matter. For once in his life, everything was going to work out. He was going to make sure of it.

Suga and Ryuu were already home. Noya heard their voices float into the hallway, punctuated by Ryuu's subdued laughter while he hastily removed his shoes. Dumb things, why couldn't he ever get them off in one go? He tried to be patient, but eventually he shoved them to the corner, dropped his bag to the space beside it, and rushed into the brightly-lit kitchen.

It was just Ryuu sitting at the dining table. He was hunched over a bowl of food that looked like last night’s dinner. Probably reheated. Noya’s eyes flickered to the closed door of Suga’s room and understanding washed over him.

“Bad day?” Noya asked, pointing to the door.

Ryuu looked up from his bowl and gave a pained smile. He looked exhausted; the bags around his eyes looked worse than the last time Noya saw him. “Work was rough, just leave him alone for a bit. Also, you’re home early - what’s with the face?”

Noya pulled up a chair across Ryuu and sat down. “What face?”

“That face. C’mon, something must’ve happened at MSA. Is it your dancer crush - what’s his name again?”

“Asahi," Noya supplied without missing a beat. "And he's not my dancer crush," he added.

“Mhm,” Ryuu said, using the very same tone Suga did from a week or so ago. The ‘I don’t believe your shit’ tone. He seemed to believe Noya as much as Suga did these days. “Whatever you say, man. Call it whatever you want -"

 _"Not_ a crush. He’s just a friend.”

"Sure." Ryuu pushed his bowl aside and propped his elbows on the table. "So? What's the news?"

Noya opened his mouth to speak, but felt the smile on his face before he could get the words out. That was it, wasn't it? The jittery feeling he's had since he left MSA was happiness. It was tiny, a flame sitting atop a just-lit match, but it was there. He's almost forgotten what it could feel like, too.

"I need tights." 

Ryuu let out a sound in between a snort and a howl. " _What_? What'd you - that's what you're smiling about? You're happy 'cause you need tights?”

"It's what I need the tights _for."_ Noya reached over the table and swatted at the space in front of Ryuu's space. "Will you pay attention!"

Ryuu's snort broke into laughter. "I don't know, buddy. It's kinda difficult when you start off saying you need some spandex."

“Spandex isn’t - I need them for dance, now listen!” Noya said with exasperation.

Ryuu’s fit of laughter immediately slowed to a halt, like a foot hitting the breaks. All traces of amusement fell off his face. ”Dude, what," he croaked, watching Noya’s expression. "This is still a joke, right? You're still joking?"

“Dude why would I joke about something like this?”

Ryuu dropped his arms to the table with a loud thud. “Holy shit. When did...this was just today?"

"Yeah." Noya settled his back against the chair, crossing his arms across his chest. “Asahi’s auditions flopped, so I volunteered to be his partner until he finds someone for the showcase.”

“So you’re dancing?”

“Uh, yeah, Ryuu. Didn’t you get that the first time?”

“No, no, I did. Just making sure I heard this right.” Ryuu held up his hand and closed his eyes, like he was trying to digest a particularly difficult thought. Though what was difficult about what Noya just told him, he couldn't fathom. Ryuu opened his eyes again, looking a little more focused as he regarded Noya from across the table. “Okay. I think I need the entire story. From the top, with details and stuff."

Noya obliged him. He told Ryuu about Asahi, about how much this showcase mattered to him, about his defeated expression after the auditions, about the light that returned to his eyes when Noya's offer was real and tangible. He did his best to assure his best friend, to let him know he could handle it, that he wanted this. 

As Noya's story progressed, Ryuu's expression grew more and more troubled. His brows furrowed together and the frown on his mouth deepened until it was etched into his face, along with the scar near his lip. He remained silent well after Noya finished talking. Only when he settled his arms back on the surface of table, hands clasped together, did he speak.

“Noya,” Ryuu began in a tone that was overly patient, like he was dealing with difficult customer at his family's restaurant back at home. Noya wasn’t sure he liked the approach. “Just - level with me for a second, man. You…haven’t danced in _years_. You told everyone you gave it up after high school, with all the dramatics to go with it. And now, out of nowhere, you just - what? Agreed to be some guy’s dance partner for an important showcase thing?”

Noya folded his arms around his middle. It's been the second time he's had to think of high school today, the part he’d rather forget, and it was making him a little nauseous. He was amazed at how he didn't flinch when Asahi mentioned it in passing earlier that day; he didn't know why it bothered him now that Ryuu said it. 

"There were no dramatics involved," he said eventually.

Ryuu let out a loud huff. ”God, of course you'd pick _that_ out of everything I said." 

"Because it's true!" 

Ryuu held his hands up in surrender. “Fine then, you get a pass on that one. I don’t wanna touch that topic and neither do you.”

“And it's not just some guy," Noya added. "It’s Asahi.”

"Who you barely know."

Noya looked at Ryuu, affronted. "We talk! We’ve been talking everyday for the past three weeks!”

“Yeah, and I’m sure his puppy dog eyes did nothing to convince you to say yes.”

“He did not have puppy dog eyes."

“What's going on?” A third voice asked. 

Noya and Ryuu turned away from each other just as Suga came out of his bedroom. His hair was more of a mess than it was on a normal day, sticking up in angles that defied gravity. His eyes were puffy and bloodshot, and he still wore his now-wrinkled button down and slacks from work.

“Noya’s dancing again," Ryuu said at once, giving Noya a pointed look. 

Suga stopped just before he reached the dining table, the fluorescent light hanging above Noya and Ryuu stopping at his neck, bathing his face in shadow. “What?”

Noya cleared his throat, giving Ryuu a look before he turned to Suga. “I’m going to be Asahi’s dance partner,” he elaborated.

“ _What_?” Suga repeated louder than the last, enunciating the last letter crisply. He turned his head to look at his half-opened bedroom door. “Should I - should I have come out of my room?”

“Maybe not.” Ryuu pulled out the seat next to him. “But now that you’re here, maybe you can help me convince Noya just how much of a bad idea this is.”

“It’s not a bad idea. It’s gonna be fine!” Noya argued as Suga slowly took his seat. "Asahi said he'd teach me everything. I just have to show up and learn everything.”

Suga blinked slowly. "So...Asahi's auditions didn't go well, is what I'm gathering?"

Noya shook his head. "It was pretty bad, and he was just so upset. It’s not even going to be permanent - Asahi’s gonna find a partner eventually. I’m just a stand in until that happens.”

Ryuu bent his head in defeat, while Suga let out an _"Ohh"_ of understanding. He turned to Ryuu. "So this is the issue?"

"There _is_ no issue," Noya argued.

Suga pressed his lips together. He turned back to Noya and began to speak in a calm, leveled voice. “But Noya, you told me he did ballet. That’s not the same as street dance at all.”

“It’s not fully ballet, it’s like…what do they call it? Contemporary? I’m not really sure, but anyway…he just looked so desperate, you know? And he said it’s ‘till my hours are up. I’ve watched your performances before, Suga - at least I have an idea, right?”

Suga's frown deepened, worry lines appearing on his forehead. “But watching and doing are completely different things," he contested.

"How hard can it be?"

"Maybe not hard, but it's really different. You remembered how much I struggled to learn street dance."

Noya’s brain didn’t supply him with the memory. ”You did fine, Suga. It's just a learning curve!"

"This is exactly what I'm afraid of." Ryuu looked at Suga. "You get it, right?"

Noya exhaled loudly. Anger was rising quick in his throat, slowly suffocating him until it was all he could think about. The logical part of his brain knew it would do him no good to be angry, but the rest of him could only think in red. Maybe there was some merit in what his friends were saying, but he couldn't see it now. He could only think about how much it made him feel like he was being attacked.

"Why are you guys being so negative about this?" Noya asked, sounding small but no less venomous.

Suga and Ryuu exchanged looks for what felt like the nth time that night. Suga intensified his look, mumbling a _"You started it”_ to which Ryuu hung his head and let out a tired sigh. 

"We're just worried, Noya," Ryuu said in a strained voice. "It's just…sometimes you take on so much on your plate. Way, _way_ too much. Then when it reaches that point, you just shut down, drop everything, and never pick it up again. How's this gonna be any different?"

“I don’t do any of that.,” Noya said. Ryuu raised his eyebrow at the doubtful turn Noya's voice took. “I don’t! Besides, this isn’t even about me. Someone else is counting on me, and I’m not gonna screw this up.”

The last part sounded more frustrated and hurt than the rest, which made Suga’s frown soften. "You didn't screw up anything, Noya."

"Then stop making it sound like I did."

“Okay. We're sorry," Suga said, reaching out across the table with his palm up. "Ryuu just worries. You know how he is."

"The worry will get to you later,” Ryuu told Suga. “We know how _you_ are." Ryuu let out a sigh and gave Noya an apologetic smile filled with guilt. "I'm sorry, Noya. Just…let’s just forget it, okay? It's great that you're dancing again."

"Really great," Suga agreed with an attempt at a smile. "Even if it's just for awhile."

“…Thanks,” Noya mumbled, pointedly ignoring Suga's hand. "I guess." 

Suga fixed Ryuu a pointed look, tilting his head towards the direction of their rooms. It took several repeats of the motion, each more obvious than the next, for Ryuu to get the hint. 

"I think I hear my phone ringing," Ryuu said as an excuse, getting up from his chair, and quickly making his exit. Suga rolled his eyes as Ryuu left before turning back to Noya.

"You do know Ryuu's just being a huge worry wart, right?" Suga asked gently, pulling his hand back and tucking it against his chest. "He worries more than I do."

Noya knew these facts all too well. Many people thought that out of the three of them, Suga would be the worrier. They couldn’t be more wrong. “He could be less aggravating.”

"I know. He could never get that balance quite right." Suga sighed quietly. "We just...we remember what happened to you after high school. Vividly. We don't want you to go through that again."

It all flashed through Noya's mind before he could stop it. His last, longing glance at a smaller, much more homey dance studio. Lunches at the rooftop with only the howling wind and occasional crow for company. The blur in between that and his graduation day. The glittering surface of a bay as he sat with his knees pulled up to his chest at the view deck. 

It was all capped off with a familiar feeling of loneliness, one that still haunted him on some odd days  which weren't as few and far in between as he would have preferred. It never really stopped; he just learned to live with it. 

Some of the anger bled out of Noya's system, settling to more manageable levels. "I know," he said, eyes tracing the lines on the dinner table. "It's not gonna be like that, I promise. I'm just helping Asahi out.”

"Which is a very you thing to do. A good thing.” Suga reached his hand out across the table again, and this time Noya placed his hand on top of his. A truce. "Show me what you learn, okay? I'm curious to see what they’re doing at MSA these days.”

Noya held back his response of _“You’d know if you came back.”_. It wasn’t going to help anyone, and he didn’t want to add to what was already a rough day for his best friend. A day that Noya made slightly more difficult. 

Instead, he said, ”Thanks, Suga. You’re always the good cop."

"Not all the time." Suga looked at their hands. “I'm just trying to help you see Ryuu's logic. And you know I can be a worse bad cop that Ryuu could ever hope to be."

"Still." Noya regarded Suga from across the table. He decided to shift the focus of the conversation. ”You okay?"

Suga gave him an empty smile. "I've been better." He pulled his hand away from Noya and slowly stood up. "I think we all just need sleep at this point."

Noya didn't argue with that as he pulled his hand back towards his body. His bones felt heavy, weighing him down until all he could do was melt through the chair and sink to the floor. 

His dark bedroom was a welcome sight, the end point of his roller coaster of a day. He shut his door and fell face first into the sheets, the coolness of it diffusing the heat on his skin. The silence of the room rang in his ears, but was quickly overtaken with an onslaught of voices, alongside respective faces. 

_"Surely there are other dancers."_

_“Watching and doing are completely different things."_

_"It's just…sometimes you take on so much on your plate. How's this gonna be any different?"_

Voices and faces mixed together in Noya’s mind, pushing down on him like an anvil that grew in weight as time passed. For a full minute, he was convinced he couldn't breathe. People have doubted him before; he was no stranger to the feeling. So why did it make him react so fiercely now? What was so different?

He knew his life was in a bit of a ditch right now, so maybe Ryuu had every reason to be skeptical, and Suga was logical when other people's feelings were concerned. So maybe their reactions, their words, their intentions had weight. Former high school incidents notwithstanding. It didn’t mean he was a hopeless case; there must be something in him worth redeeming. 

Asahi saw it in him, he must have. Noya curled his hand closed, the same one Asahi held in desperation to convince him, and pressed it to his chest. Did it really matter if they just met a few weeks ago, if they've only scratched the surface of what it meant to be friends? Was it too much for him to want to help someone? Couldn't that be enough of a reason to act?

The questions continued to ring in Noya's mind well into the late night, and he allowed himself to stew in it.

*

The feeling went away in the morning, something that Noya was immensely glad for. He could always count on sleep to act as a reset button, to let him feel a little less lost and a little more like himself. Even if his sleep was an intermittent total of about three hours and felt more like prolonged blinks.

Still, his mind wandering late at night wasn’t for nothing. He recognized the undercurrent of determination in him, one that had settled in his stomach after his second bout of sleep. He felt the spark in his chest, the fire beginning to rise in him. He was going to get this right - he was going to do this and do it _well._ Things were going to be different this time.

Suga and Ryuu watched him as subtly as they could during breakfast.. Ryuu danced around Noya like he was on a tight rope, and Noya was just about to tell him off for it when Ryuu nearly slipped with his plate full of breakfast. 

“Stupid socks!” he shouted, sleep fading at the edges of his consciousness from the incident. He was completely unaware of the egg-shaped oil stain on his gray tank top. Noya and Suga snickered to themselves until Ryuu demanded to know why.

“Looks like the start of an egg-citing day for you, man,” Noya said. 

Suga burst into a fit of laughter, shaking his head at Noya. “Noya, _no._ No horrible puns at breakfast”

“What are you two going on about?” Ryuu asked.

Noya and Suga exchanged looks, before Suga granted Ryuu mercy and pointed to the front of his shirt. 

“Like Noya said.” Suga covered his mouth with his hand to stifle his laughter. “Egg-citing.”

Ryuu looked down at his shirt and let out a loud groan. “Oh come on. Not again.”

Noya’s classes droned on as always, but he wasn’t really there. His mind was far off, already stepping into the sunbathed dance studio, anticipating the feeling of music thrumming in his veins as he moved, Asahi waiting for him -

He coughed loudly, causing his classmates to turn back to look at him, and he had to cover his mouth to hide his smile. The thought of all of it shouldn’t make him too giddy, Asahi was just a new friend after all. He was supposed to be _helping_ , he reminded himself.

Asahi was early as always, which derailed Noya’s efforts of pulling himself together before they started practice. He wasn’t in the middle of a routine this time; he just stood in front of the mirror with his hands on his hips, lip jutting out and eyes far in thought. That wasn’t why Noya was short-circuiting by the doorway.

Asahi wasn’t wearing his usual sweatpants today - instead he wore a dark gray shirt that hung loosely on his shoulders, and the tightest black tights he’s ever seen on a person. And this was saying something considering Noya was the self-proclaimed ambassador of skinny jeans. They might as well be painted on, emphasizing every curve and muscle there ever was on Asahi, cutting off at his ankles leading to the tan skin of his feet. 

Noya might have stopped breathing. He could feel his heartbeat soar in speed in his chest, which made his stomach sink with dread. No, Ryuu was wrong - he didn’t have a crush on Asahi. From an objective standpoint, there was no contest that Asahi was attractive, but it wasn’t a crush. Even if it was, Noya wouldn’t let it turn into anything else, wouldn’t let it mess up what they were supposed to do. It was at then that Asahi decided to turn. “Oh Noya, I didn’t hear you come in.”

Noya reminded himself to pick up his jaw from the floor. “That’s fine,” he said, voice cracking in more places than there were syllables. “I was just…” With difficulty, he pulled his gaze away to look Asahi in the face. “Anyway! I’m here, as promised.”

“You are.” Asahi gave Noya a once over and let out a quiet laugh, more amused than mocking. “You don’t own tights, do you, Noya?”

Noya shook his head proudly. “All dance needs is some baggy clothes, which I happen to have a lot of. Is that okay?”

“It’s just fine. Whatever you’re comfortable with.”

“Cool.” Noya walked past Asahi and over to the mirrors, dropping his bag to the floor and toeing off his shoes. “So, what are we starting with today?”

Asahi’s smile instantly morphed into a line of worry. “Oh, Noya. Before we start…”

Noya felt his insides turn into ice. He watched as Asahi’s eyes flickered to the floor for a moment, and Noya felt his mind brace himself for the words he wasn’t sure he was ready to hear right before they started.

“I feel I have to say this.” Asahi took his bottom lip between his teeth, and the momentary silence between them seemed to last hours. “I might have been a little…pushy yesterday? When I asked you, I mean.” He paused, hands floundering about in front of him. “I didn’t mean to - to put you on the spot like that.”

“Oh.” Some of the feeling returned to Noya’s hands and feet. He didn’t know he could lose all that in less than a  minute. “Is that what this is about?”

Asahi’s expression turned a little shy and a little sheepish as he nodded. “I guess what I’m trying to say is if you changed your mind…or - or if you felt pressured by me, I’m giving you an out.”

“Ohh.” At this point, all of the feeling returned to Noya’s limbs. Enough to switch on the lightbulb that had gone out in his head.

“Yeah,” Asahi said, looking down at his feet. “So…if you’re not feeling up to this, you can -“

“No!” Noya shouted, cutting off Asahi’s train of thought and surprising them both. “No. I - I want to do this.”

Asahi barely hid the relief on his face. “Really?” He asked. “You’re sure?”

“Hundred percent,” Noya replied, flashing a grin because he meant it. “I was serious when I said yes, Asahi. Don’t worry. I’m perfectly capable of making lasting, split-second decisions.”

“Lasting, split-second decisions?”

“It’s a thing, with me.”

Asahi let out a sigh of relief, followed by an amused smile. “Okay,” he said. “I just didn’t want to pressure you.”

“It’s no pressure.”

“But if you change your mind, or if you get too busy with your classes or work, just - you can tell me. It’s okay.”

“I’ll remember that. But trust me, Asahi. I’m going to see this through.”

Asahi gave another exhale of relief. “Thank you for doing this.”

“It’s nothing.” Noya placed his hands on his hips. “So! What’ll you teach me today? Turns? More of that leg fanning…thing?”

“It’s just called a fan, actually,” Asahi replied with a chuckle, walking over to the center of the room. “But we’ll start off with something easy. Some basics to ease you in.”

“Oh. Well, basics sound good.” Noya trailed after Asahi, and positioned himself an arms length away from his right. “Teach away.”

“Okay.” Asahi seemed to shrink into himself, his eyes darting around like he was being watched. When he spoke again, his voice was much smaller and softer than earlier. “Uhm…copy me? Stand up straight, and feet together.” 

Noya obeyed, keeping his feet together and arms at his sides. He looked at Asahi from the mirror to check.“Is this okay?” 

Asahi assessed Noya quietly, eyebrows pulling together. “Shoulders back a bit?” Noya complied, but Asahi’s expression remained the same. He faced away from the mirror again. “But…not too stiff? Relax just a little? But not too much!”

“Is your dance normally this particular?” Noya couldn’t help but ask as he willed his shoulders to relax. He couldn't remember his first dance lesson ever being like this, but that was nearly a decade ago. His memory might be faulty. ”When do we get to actually dance, Asahi?"

“Oh.” Asahi spun back to face the mirror so fast his feet squeaked against the floor. Not looking directly at Noya seemed to dissipate his nervousness. “Right now. I'll - I’ll do it slowly, okay?" 

Noya grinned again to reassure him. “I’m ready!”

Asahi transformed right in front of Noya’s eyes. The nervousness rolled off his shoulders like a heavy cloak, revealing the person Noya was so enamored by on his first day at MSA. Noya’s instincts told him only one thing - to keep silent and watch.

Asahi began by crossing his right foot over his left, slowly raising his forearms in front of him as if he were pushing against a wall. He bent his right arm under his left, a thread weaving into the eye of a needle, and he used it to push the air to his left, bending low and turning swiftly, all while his left leg drew a half circle on the hardwood. 

With his back curved inward, chin touching his chest, and right hand behind him, Asahi lifted himself up. He kicked his right leg weightlessly and soundlessly in front of him as he spun his body, before finally stopping facing opposite the mirror. 

In the midst of it all, Noya reminded himself to blink. And breathe. Asahi had the habit of generating multiple forms of speechlessness from him.

Asahi tucked a wayward strand of hair behind his ear, smiling shyly and breaking the illusion of grace and poise he just so wonderfully executed as he looked back at Noya. moved like it was breathing for him and not actually some sort of miracle. 

"Did you get that?" He asked.

Noya did not get all of that. Asahi lost him as soon as he started moving. Looking at a routine and cutting it down to steps felt a lot more difficult now that they weren’t playing around. This was supposed to be _basic?_

"Yeah, I think so," he replied in a whisper. He shook his head, trying to get all the fluff out of his brain and willing himself to focus. "Just um...the part after the turn. Could you maybe do that again?"

"How about we go through everything together?" Asahi suggested.

"Yes! Yes, okay. That's a really good idea. Let's do that." Noya hurried and copied the first stance Asahi took. "From here?"

"From there." Asahi got into the same first pose, forearms set out in front of his face. “I could count if you want? To make it easier to follow?”

Noya wasn't sure any form of counting was going to make it easier. “Okay."

Asahi started his count. Noya had to strain his ears to hear it, inching closer, all while looking to Asahi to copy the moves he couldn’t follow. He moved half a beat late, and nearly tripped over his feet at the seventh count.

“And one - oh!” Asahi dropped his arms immediately, rushing to Noya’s side. “Are you okay?”

“I’m good!” Noya answered loudly. He stood upright as quick as he could and placed his hands on his hips. “See? I just…got confused for a moment.” He felt himself grow small. “You _might_ have to repeat that for me, Asahi.”

“Which part?”

Noya stuttered for a second. No - he couldn’t admit that Asahi had to repeat everything. He could still do this. He just had to pay attention. “Just…the first two eighths? That’s what you call them, right? A whole count to eight is an eighth?”

Asahi looked surprised that Noya knew this. “Yeah, that’s right,” he said. “Sorry, I was probably going too fast. Here, the first four counts go like this.”

Learning the steps was a little like moving through tar. Or like kicking through quicksand. One wrong move and Noya felt himself paralyzed, slipping through the cracks and not knowing what to do. He didn't know why his brain couldn't keep up. He mimicked each movement as best as he could: following the curve of Asahi's arm, the way Asahi's foot pointed sharply forward. His body just wouldn’t cooperate, like the connection between his mind and his limbs was severed.

 _“Watching and doing are completely different things,"_ Suga reminded him in his mind. It sounded like he was mocking Noya now.

It took about five rounds before Noya felt more sure of where this was all going. Each movement seemed foreign to his body, limbs bolted to rusty hinges. It was so different from the isolated, on beat shrug of the shoulders and snappy movements he was used to. He was realizing slowly that Asahi's kind of dance required your entire body to move and to move big, and Noya felt uncomfortably too small for it.

"And eight, left leg out - that's good!" Asahi planted his left foot back on the floor and smiled for the first time since they began. 

"I think I got it now." Noya said. At this point he was out of breath, but his mind felt sharper and his muscles more pliable. This was familiar to him - it meant he was finally warmed up and ready. “Pretty sure this time. Another run?”

“Let’s…maybe take a break first?” Asahi proposed hesitantly. Noya noticed for the first time how exhausted Asahi was, the line of his shoulders drooping and the front of his shirt drenched in sweat.

“Oh right.” Noya felt guilty immediately. “Shit, of course.”

“Thanks.” Asahi wiped off the sweat off his brow with the sleeve of his shirt. Noya tried his best to keep his eyes on Asahi's face and not at the flash of skin. Perhaps he was still a little distracted. “Sorry, my stamina is a bit low. You’re doing really good so far, Noya. Great work.”

Noya still didn’t think it was enough. He still moved too stiff and he couldn’t get the timing _just_ right. He let himself fall to the floor, looking at the dark ceiling above him. “Thanks.”

Asahi appeared in his line of sight, loose strands of hair falling down the sides of his face. It was nearly a third of his hair now, which made his ponytail a bit useless. He looked tired and sweaty, but nowhere near how Noya felt. He smiled sympathetically at Noya. “It’s okay. The first day back is usually the hardest.”

“It didn’t used to be,” Noya mumbled, letting his chest heave, allowing his lungs to catch up with his breathing. "Sit down, Asahi, before you drip sweat on my face."

"Oh, right." Asahi disappeared from his vision, and when Noya craned his neck to peek, Asahi had taken a spot right next to Noya's hip. "Better?"

Noya raised his arm and gave Asahi a thumbs up. “Much."

"You did really good though. I mean it,” Asahi crossed his legs, tucking one under the other. "I wasn't just saying that.”

Noya let the words wash through him, hoping it would make some of his exhaustion mean something. With considerable effort and a loud groan of protest, he pushed himself off the floor to sit up. "No regrets choosing me yet?"

Asahi shook his head. "Of course not."

They were silent for a few moments while Noya caught his breath, Asahi still smiling at Noya. Eventually, Asahi widened his eyes and directed his gaze to the windows. Outside the afternoon sun danced through the trees, brightening the sky and making everything else look more vibrant. A light breeze blew into the room, barely enough to cool down Noya's heated skin. 

“Was it hard for you, too?” Noya asked after awhile.

Asahi turned back to face him. “What was?”

“Your first day dancing,” Noya clarified. “How old were you again?”

“I think I was about six.” Asahi adjusted his position, bending his knees out in front of him and laying his palms out to his sides. A thoughtful expression crossed his face. “I think I tripped through the entire lesson. It was embarrassing.”

“Really?” Noya couldn’t picture it. “That sounds kinda impossible to me, Asahi.”

“Oh, believe it.” Asahi chuckled, his cheeks turning red. “I was horrible for the first three years, at least. My brother said it was like watching uncooked spaghetti trying to move.”

“That’s harsh. And a little creative,” Noya admitted.

“He wasn’t wrong though,” Asahi said. “Everyone has to start from somewhere. It might take awhile to learn, even if you’re learning again, but you will get better.” His eyes flickered to Noya, before he looked away shyly. “That’s what I learned, anyway. I don’t always believe it though, if yesterday is anything to go by.”

“You were having a bad day, I think you get a free pass. Even if you should believe in yourself a little bit more. You’re kind of amazing, Asahi.”

Asahi looked away, and his eyes grew sad. “It’s a work in progress,” he said. “What about you?”

“What about me?”

“What was your first dance class like?”

Noya tensed. He hadn’t had to think about that in a long time, the memory locked away in the recesses of his mind. 

Asahi backtracked. “You don’t have to tell me -“

“It was before high school.” The words left Noya’s mouth before he realized it. “It was just supposed to be a summer thing - me and my best friends, Ryuu and Suga. And…I don’t know. I just picked it up like I was doing it all my life.”

“You must have been really good.”

“I was _great,_ and I loved it,” Noya said. “Just…being on that stage, with the lights in your eyes, feeling the music all the way to your bones and giving it everything you’ve got? It’s the best feeling in the world.”

He was almost there, his memories of dancing on stage playing all at once, morphing seamlessly into one performance. He could almost feel the blood pumping in his veins, could almost hear the music and the crowd and the applause. It made him feel light and whole. _Alive_. 

Asahi’s smile seemed to mirror the feeling in Noya’s chest. “I know what you mean,” he said. “But…you stopped?”

“Yeah...I did.” The memories faded as fast as they came. Suddenly, he was alone on that stage, with its ringing silence and empty rows of seats, with only himself for company. He looked at Asahi and forced himself to smile. “But that was a long time ago. I’m here now, and that’s what matters.”

“Back to dancing.”

“Back to dancing,” Noya echoed. It wasn’t what he used to do, and he was taking longer to learn than usual, but it was something. The image of an empty stage still bothered him, so he kept talking. “So, back to the routine. What’s the next sequence?”

“I think we should stop learning choreo for today. I don’t want to overload you.” Asahi stood up slowly, pushing his hands against the floor to anchor himself up. He held out his arm in front of Noya. “Do you want to try it with music this time?”

Right, they still had to try it with _music._ His bones grew heavy with the thought. With a heavy exhale, Noya pushed away all his negative feelings, giving Asahi a smile as he took his hand. ”You got it.”

The music made things harder. Not that it surprised Noya at this point.  

Watching Asahi dance for the last few weeks didn’t give him any sort of edge. Finding the right timing and the beat alone confused him. That familiar heat of embarrassment was creeping up his face again, and he could almost imagine the lines of irritation on Asahi's face, or even some form of exasperation.

Except it wasn't there. Asahi definitely looked a little more worn, a little more tired as they progressed, but he didn't scold Noya at all. Every time Noya screwed up, or thought he did, he waited for a sharply-toned instruction that didn't come. 

"Want me to run it again?” Asahi asked instead, wiping the sweat from his brow with the back of his palm. 

“Yes please!” Noya replied, waving him off as he tried to catch his breath. He _had_ to get it. He danced for six years of his life before he stopped, he could get this. He _would_ get this. “Sorry, Asahi. The music just...it’s different from what I’m used to.”

“Different how?” Asahi looked curious as he regarded Noya.

Noya stood up straight, hand on his hip as he thought about it. Huh. He never actually had to explain that to anyone before.“I’m not sure,” he said. “It’s like…it’s kind of automatic to me. I hear the beat and my body just knows where the moves fit.” He looked to Asahi, who looked just as lost as Noya expected him to. “That doesn’t make much sense, does it?”

“Well...it kinda does?” Asahi allowed. “You just described what it’s like for me when I hear music like this.” He clicked the tiny remote in his hand and the lightness of a harp filled the room. 

Noya kept silent, trying to hear the underlying beat he was sorely missing, searching for the pockets where the turns and brush of his arms could fit. The lack of a heavy bass and lyrics made it difficult. 

“Can I watch you again?” He asked. “Just you this time. I might understand it better if I see how you understand it.”

Asahi clicked pause on his remote. “No problem. Here.” He reached his arm out, remote between his fingers. “Just rewind and start the track again please.”

“Okay.” Noya took the remote from Asahi, the tips of their fingers brushing. Electricity zinged through them upon contact, but Noya fought it off with a cough. “I’m...sorry this is taking so long. For me to learn, I mean. I’m supposed to be helping you.”

“You _are_ helping.” Asahi gave a reassuring smile as he took a few steps back towards the back of the room. “Please, Noya, it’s okay. You don’t have to be sorry about anything.”

Noya frowned. He didn’t like this; he didn’t like being able to barely catch up. He didn’t like struggling at something that used to come so naturally to him. “I feel like I’m wasting your time.”

Asahi’s smile wavered, and he looked at Noya sadly. “You’re not,” he said, voice gaining an edge of conviction. “I promise.”

“But Asahi -”

“Count to three, please?”

Noya let all the retorts die on his tongue. The way Asahi looked at him managed to untangle the knot that had formed in his stomach since they started. “Okay,” he said. He held up the remote. “One, two…three.”

The hum of the harps filled the room again. Asahi’s expression shifted easily - eyes sharper and body ready to spring into action. As the piano softly filtered in, Asahi moved. He danced weightlessly as always, his feet softly gliding across the floor as his leg swept for a smooth turn. 

Noya knew the steps. He could manage to piece it into something that looked vaguely like a dance, but that wasn’t what he was seeing now. Asahi made the entire sequence of steps flawless, like they were connected to each other, water flowing down a clear stream. He bent his head backwards, kicking his left leg up like it weighed like nothing as he moved across the floor. Noya didn’t realize it was over until Asahi stopped, chest heaving and brushing the strands of hair away from his face. 

“How was that?” Asahi asked. “Does it make more sense?”

Noya clicked the pause button, submerging the room back into silence. He wasn’t sure Asahi’s dancing could make _sense_. Something heavy and dark curled somewhere in his gut. With Asahi’s talent, did he really need Noya to make his dances better? Considering he did so well even in practice? 

“You made it look so smooth,” Noya said eventually. “It was flawless.”

Asahi’s cheeks turned pink. “I - thank you,” he said shyly. “Though it wasn’t flawless at all. I messed up my turn and extended the wrong foot at the end.”

“I didn’t notice.” Though now that Noya thought about it, he did realize that Asahi was right about his mistake. “You made it look like it was a part of the entire thing.”

“Ah. I guess I improvised better than I thought.” Asahi said, turning a little red in the cheeks. Noya did his best to ingrain the image in his mind to think about later. “But the timing - did you understand better?”

“A little bit,” Noya admitted. He owed Asahi that much honesty, at least. “I’m not so lost on the last part, at least. With the double turns.”

“It’s a little tricky,” Asahi said. “Do you want to try it together? With music?”

Noya hesitated for a second, frustration sitting deep in his muscles that pulled and stretched only to progress so little. He looked at Asahi, who looked so open and encouraging even when Noya was pretty sure he was slowing down their progress by at least four times. He wasn’t sure he deserved so much patience, especially for something that was supposed to be important. Especially for something that Noya used to do so well at. 

“Noya?”

“Huh?” Noya returned to the present. “Oh. Yeah. Yeah, let’s do it.”

Asahi paused. “You’re not too tired, are you? We could stop here. We’ve done a lot today.”

“No!” Noya said a little too loudly. He quickly amended, burying his emotions as quick as he could. “I’m - I’m fine. I was just...reviewing the dance in my head, that’s all. Can I handle the remote?”

Asahi hesitated. He watched Noya’s expression, looking for something that Noya couldn’t place. Noya feared for a moment that Asahi finally caught on.

“How about this,” Noya began. “Last two runs, then we call it a day. I promise to give it everything I’ve got.” He gave Asahi a wide smile, hoping it would be enough to deter his attention, to let Asahi believe that he could still do this. 

Eventually, Asahi nodded. “Okay. Let’s do it.”

In his mind, when Noya turned to face the mirror, he let out a sigh of relief. 

*

Noya left the studio after three runs and a hurried attempt at cooling down. Asahi’s insistence, not his. He was never good with warming up and cooling down properly, so he could be certain of stiff, aching muscles tomorrow.

His body and his mind screamed with exhaustion. Nearly the same as yesterday, except he didn’t feel light and alive. It was the opposite: strung out, lethargic, and just plain bad. He had not wanted to think of it then at the studio, but now that he was alone with his thoughts, he had to admit to himself that he struggled. 

His seventeen-year old self would be ashamed of his performance. 

Maybe it was too optimistic of him to think that he’d pick dance up so easily on the first try, but shouldn’t it have been...what, muscle memory or something? Like riding a bike? Could you really forget a certain way of moving your body? 

What was even more upsetting was that Asahi didn’t tell him off for it. Not once. Noya knew it wasn’t even up to any sort of standard, so why did Asahi let it go on? Was he really that nice? Or did he really expect Noya to perform the way he did?

That made him feel even worse. So much that he got off the train two stops earlier and opted to walk the rest of the way. Screw feeling tired.

There was a box of pizza waiting on the dinner table at home, and he made a scramble for it. Four slices - four cheese and seafood with olives, two of each. It was Suga’s turn to cook for tonight, and a pizza order meant that either he got home too late to cook anything or he was still feeling off. As Noya heated the pizzas up in the oven toaster and wolfed them down, he hoped it wasn’t the latter.

The door to Ryuu’s room was closed, with a bright orange sticky note pasted in the middle. In Ryuu code, that meant ‘I have a ton of shit I need to get done. Will only come out in the event of a natural calamity’. Noya wasn’t pissed at Ryuu anymore, but he still wasn’t up for his company. Busy was a good thing in this case.

Suga’s door was left slightly open, with a strip warm yellow light shining across the floor in front of it. . Noya kept his footsteps light, approaching slowly and peering in. 

Suga sat on the edge of his bed, surrounded by the aftermath of what Noya could only describe as a whirlwind. His things were strewn everywhere - crumpled papers, pairs of jeans and slacks on top of a variety of t-shirts and button-ups, along with empty boxes and folded up paper bags. On his lap was an empty shoe box, and in his hands he held a pair of ballet slippers, soles worn and the once-light gray canvas was dirtied up with black. He stared at it like it broke his heart. 

Noya knew that he and Ryuu were right about Suga wanting to return to dance and to MSA . That Suga was just afraid. He wished he knew what to say; he never did whenever the topic came up for discussion, and he didn’t now that he had the proof of their suspicions in front of him.

Suga spotted him before he could make his exit. “What’re you doing standing out there?” He asked, tone forcibly light.

“Nothing!” Noya said immediately, and cursed himself for how quickly he said it. “What - uh...what are you doing?”

“Just cleaning up. My room’s been a mess lately.” Suga sighed and placed the shoes back inside their box, putting the lid on top and looking back to Noya. “Looks like there’s something on your mind. Why don’t you come in?”

Noya hesitated for a second. Only when Suga beckoned him again did he open the door and step into the room. 

“How was dancing with Asahi?” Suga asked, patting the space next to him.

“Went fine,” Noya answered.

“Had a hard time?”

“Nah. Picked it up easier than I thought I would,” Noya said, grateful for the ease of which he said it. He schooled his expression to remain as untroubled as possible.

Suga’s face lit up. “That’s good! Feel free to rub that in Ryuu’s face, he might deserve it a bit.”

Noya’s shoulders deflated and his heartbeat resumed its rhythm in his chest. “He had the right to be worried, I guess,” he said, finding that he meant it. He looked around at the cacophony of things strewn around them. “Your room is a bit of a mess.”

“Isn’t it?” Suga picked up a dark blue shirt on his desk and began folding it in his lap. “How I tolerated it for so long deceives me.”

“So much for being the one to keep this apartment in shape.”

“Yeah, so much for that. I’m even messier than you these days.”

“Send pictures to my mother. She’d love to see it.”

“She wouldn’t believe me. She’d probably think you or Ryuu trashed my room just to make you guys look good.”

Noya laughed. “Yeah, you’re probably right.”

They sat in silence for a minute or two. What Noya thought about on the way home conquered his mind again. He considered telling Suga, for an insane second. He’d be the most understanding about it right? Or he could just air his thoughts a little? Would that be so bad?

Asahi’s disappointed face came to his mind, mouth pulled down for a second before he’d try to school his expression into a smile, and guilt sank in Noya’s stomach like a lead ballon. Asahi would probably say it’s okay, that he didn’t expect Noya to do so much for him. Or maybe he would be relieved he wouldn’t be dealing with teaching Noya the same three moves over and over.

“Suga,” Noya said, breaking the silence. Suga looked up from his lap. “Can I ask you something? Hypothetically, I mean.”

“Well, sure. You know you can ask me anything.”

Noya ran through his thoughts again. How could he even begin to phrase what he felt? Where could he start? All the words jumbled together and went up his throat.

“Can I borrow some shoes?”

Suga’s eyebrows furrowed. “Shoes?”

“To...to dance in,” Noya clarified quickly. “I mean, barefoot is fine but my feet are dry as hell. I think the floor gave me blisters.” He lifted his foot and pointed to the growing red spots at the soles of his feet. “See?”

Suga’s face scrunched up, sufficiently distracted. “Yeah, I never liked dancing barefoot either. I think I have an extra I never used.” He bent down and reached his arm under his bed, hand moving underneath the edge of the duvet until he pulled out a small black shoe box. “Here.”

Noya took the box from Suga’s hands, a thin layer of dust covering the top. He uncovered it to see a much cleaner, less battered version of the shoes Suga held in his hands earlier. This pair was black, the canvas material rough as he brushed his thumb over the tip of the shoe. 

Something stirred in Noya’s chest as he looked at it. All this time he was used to wearing down all the sneakers down to the soles, but something about these slippers lessened the guilt in his stomach a bit. Maybe even enough to feel better about how horribly he danced today. 

“I probably won’t be using them anytime soon, so you can have them,” Suga said. “They deserve to see the light of day.”

“I’ll give them back,” Noya countered. “Or replace them.”

Suga shook his head. “They’re yours now. I’m sure Asahi’s routines will put them to good use.”

Noya fought off a wince. The guilt was somewhere on his tongue now, and he bit it to stop himself from saying anything on the subject. “Don’t make it sound like you’re never going to use them,” he told Suga. 

Suga averted his eyes, looking down at the closed box in his lap. He cleared his throat. “Well, if you need to wash them, I’ll teach you.” He put the box on his bed and stood up. “I’m going to go check on Ryuu. Make sure he hasn’t fallen asleep.”

“You’re avoiding the topic.”

Suga eyed him sharply, but not seriously. There was a hint of a smile on his face. “So are you, Nishinoya Yuu,” he said slyly. “I’ll talk about it if you’ll talk.”

Noya groaned, allowing himself to fall on Suga’s bed. A clear stalemate. “Fine, you win.”

“I rarely ever lose.” Suga carefully stepped over his many belongings. “And please get off my bed. I just changed my sheets and I can’t have them smelling like sweat.”

Noya sat up. “My sweat’s dry.”

He watched Suga flinch as he exited. “Even worse!”

Hours later after a prolonged hot shower and staring at the ceiling of his room, Noya came to a decision. It made his stomach turn at the thought of it, but he knew it was the right thing to do. The decent thing to do. Asahi deserved decency. Noya owed it to him for showing Noya so much warmth and kindness since the day they met.

If Noya’s performance didn’t improve by the end of next week, he was going to quit. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you as always to [hotaryu](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hotaryu/pseuds/hotaryu) for guiding me plot-wise and being my cheerleader throughout the process. 
> 
> Feel free to chat with me on [Twitter](http://twitter.com/incendiarywit_) and/or [Tumblr](http://in-cendiarywit.tumblr.com)! I promise I don't bite, and I'm more active on those two platforms anyway!
> 
> Thanks for reading! ヽ(*⌒∇⌒*)ﾉ


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for the irresponsible length of this chapter. I tried to keep the word count down, but as things go with me, they run too far to catch. ( ⌓̈ )
> 
> I’d like to direct your attention to the summary portion of this fic - I give a general range of dates when you can expect updates. I’ll be busy for December with other projects, so you’ll see Chapter 6 in January. If you want live/more detailed updates, feel free to look through my Twitter.
> 
> Thank you as always for your patience. Hope you enjoy this chapter! (´ ᴗ｀✿)

Noya finally got home and he was ready to pass out. It’d been the longest day of the week - from his full set of morning classes, to dance practice in the afternoon, to a shift at work he’d rather forget about. He had dinner at work, so all he had to do now was wash the sweat, grime, and whatever else off his skin and sink into the cushions of his bed.

The afternoon was easily the best part of his day. He and Asahi laughed about awkward movements and strangely-named dance terms for the greater part of practice, especially after Asahi tripped over air when they ran through the chorus. They were about a third of a way into the dance now, slow by Noya’s standards despite Asahi reassuring him they were making good progress. 

Quitting was still at the forefront of his mind. Tomorrow was his personal deadline; while he improved enough to follow choreography, he was still a long way off from how he used to be. It was for the best, Noya told himself over and over. Asahi would find another partner who could cope better and that would be the end. 

Maybe Noya just wasn’t made to dance anymore. Maybe there were some things you were meant to leave behind and never return to.

His gut protested wildly - like he was being tugged in different directions - but Noya chalked it up to the fact that he just liked spending time with Asahi. He would miss their sunlit afternoons in the studio, but they could see each other after Noya’s cleaning duty. Well, until his hours were up anyway. That was another pool of thoughts he had no desire to dive into. 

Ryuu was on the couch when Noya got home. His hands were clasped together and he stared at the wall in front of him with a deep frown. There wasn’t a laptop or stack of notebooks in sight, so Noya couldn’t really pin down what was wrong. 

He made his presence known, his feet padding noisier than normal against the floor, and Ryuu looked up. 

“Hey,” Ryuu greeted, his voice almost too even.

“Hey man,” Noya returned in the same tone, setting his bag down beside the couch. “Why you still up? Isn’t tomorrow morning like the class of death or whatever?”

“Yeah, but I had something to do first.” Ryuu wrung his intertwined hands even more. “I owe you an apology.”

Noya paused. He allowed himself time to think, going through his recent memory but coming up empty. “What for? Did you put my white shirts in with your red ones again?”

Ryuu snorted. “No. I don’t know if I have the cash to spare to buy you new shirts to draw on. This was about…last week.”

“Last week?”

Ryuu smacked his forehead with his palm. “I forgot you had the memory of both a goldfish and an elephant. I’m talking about the time you told us you were dancing with Asahi.”

The memory immediately floated to his mind. Dinner table. Arguments. Frustration. “Oh.”

Ryuu patted the space next to him, and Noya took the cue to sit down. “It was too much,” he said. “I didn’t mean to be so negative about everything. And to say the stuff I did -”

Noya held his hands out in front of him. “Dude, seriously, it’s cool. I get why you did it. Plus, you already said sorry.”

Ryuu shook his head. “But that sorry was a ‘Let’s keep the peace’ sorry. It doesn’t count.”

“Why wouldn’t it count?”

Ryuu scratched the back of his head, caught between exasperation and softness.“So we’re okay?”

Noya scoffed. “Of course we’re okay. We’re great - we’re golden.”

“Okay, okay good. I was carrying this little guilt baby since last week and I was kinda ready to throw up.”

“Ryuu, that doesn’t even make sense.”

“It makes plenty sense if it eats you up at night.” Ryuu eyed him for a second. “Right, I forgot who I was talking to.”

“What’s that supposed to mean!”

“Nothing you need to worry your pretty hair about,” Ryuu said, reaching out and mussing up Noya’s hair. He scrunched his nose as soon as he did. “Jeez, I forget how sweaty you can get. You need a shower.”

Noya stood up. “I was going to before you ambushed me with your guilt baby!” 

Ryuu pulled on his sleeve to get him to sit back down. “Fine, you can take your shower later! Just sit with me for awhile.” 

“You’re procrastinating, aren’t you?”

“Shh!” Ryuu’s eyes flickered to his half-open door. “Don’t let my revisions hear you. I’m taking a well-deserved break before editing.”

“So, procrastinating.”

Ryuu looked guilty as charged. “I’m talking to the procrastinating expert, after all.”

Noya snorted, leaning back until his shoulders hit the back of the couch. “Well, at least I’m honest about it. Not proud, but honest.”

“Sometimes that’s all we can hope for.” Ryuu rested his back on the couch, his shoulders touching Noya’s. “So how’s the dance…thing so far? Going okay?”

All lightness from Noya joking around with Ryuu faded in a flash. “It’s going fine.”

Ryuu pointed his finger at Noya’s face, making Noya a little cross-eyed. “Your eye twitched. It’s not going fine.”

Noya swiped Ryuu’s hand away. “It really is going fine! It’s just…different to what I do.”

“Different from what you used to do, you mean.” 

Noya didn’t know why the correction made him want to squirm. “I guess,” he said. “I mean, it’s a lot more…floaty. But not as…structured?”

“Sounds complicated.”

_You have no idea_ , Noya wanted to say. “It’s…kinda complicated,” he allowed. “But I’m getting the hang of it. Asahi’s been really patient with me.”

“So this Asahi is the nice guy-type?”

“The nicest. Ryuu, it’s unreal.” Noya sat up so he could look at Ryuu properly. “If this was Namashita’s class I would’ve been sent out after day two, I’m not even kidding. Every time I think Asahi’s gonna get frustrated or angry, he just goes, ‘Do you need me to show you again? Maybe I ran by it too quickly.’.”

Ryuu’s left brow rose to the edge of his hairline. “ _That_ nice?”

“That nice! It’s so weird because he’s this huge, broad shouldered tough-looking guy but he’s so shy. He speaks all soft but when you get him to talk he just goes on and it’s so interesting to listen to. And it’s all so frustrating because he’s _so_ good at dance but he keeps saying he’s just okay! I just - !” Noya let his arms fly around him wordlessly. “I can’t figure this guy out! I didn’t even know people like him existed!”

He looked back at Ryuu who had the widest smirk on his face. “What?”

Ryuu shook his head, laughing to himself. “Nothing.”

Noya shook Ryuu’s shoulder. “It’s not nothing!”

“It’s just funny that you said all that but won’t admit to me and Suga that you don’t have a crush on the guy.”

Noya felt his face heat up, and he pulled his hand away. “It’s because I don’t!”

“You just went into a speech about how much you like the guy. That’s on the same level as Suga’s cheesy smile after he comes home from the bakery!”

“Dude, Asahi and the Cheese Tart Guy are not on the same level.”

Ryuu exhaled loudly. “I don’t know why I bother arguing with you when I can’t win,” he said. “So does Asahi know?”

“Know about what?”

“That you quit dance.”

The exasperation Noya felt segued into uneasiness. Hearing the words made him feel unbalanced, like he was walking on a tightrope and set to fall from a light breeze. He wasn’t sure he could even compare it to a light breeze - it was more like blustery winds from a huge, looming storm.

Noya pressed his lips together, last week’s conversation filtering into his mind. “No,” he answered. 

Ryuu watched him, eyes sharp and unyielding. “Are you planning to?”

“I don’t know. Should I? It doesn’t really matter much to me anymore. I’m not sure Asahi’d wanna hear about it.”

Ryuu was quiet for a while, and Noya could almost hear the gears turning in his head. The silence made Noya’s skin feel prickly, and he let his eyes wander around the living room to give himself something to do. 

“Listen, Noya,” Ryuu said, voice a touch quieter than earlier, but a lot more serious. “You like people easily, but you don’t trust everyone. Not a lot of people see it but you always have your guard up. So I have to know - do you trust Asahi?” He held his hand up before Noya could make a sound. “Think about this for a second.”

Noya closed his mouth. His mind was a a mess he supposed - too many thoughts flying around that he couldn’t hear himself,. Usually this meant that it would take him forever to find his answer, but then something in his mind clicked, like the sound of the right key unlocking a door. He followed the train of thought and discovered the answer was simple. 

“I want to,” Noya said. The words rang in the air and he felt his shoulders relax. “I don’t know why. Which sounds weird, I know. There’s just… _something_ that makes me want to be around him all the time.”

The barest hint of a smile grew on Ryuu’s lips. “And you don’t mind that he would want to know stuff about you?”

“No. I don’t mind. He just never seems to mind that my life is a bit of a mess.”

“Because it’s _not_ a mess,” Ryuu replied, some sternness seeping into his voice. “You’re just trying to get by like everyone else. I keep having to tell you that.” He paused, and when he spoke again, it was softer. “And well, if he’s as good as you say he is…maybe give it a chance?”

Something dark and heavy settled into Noya’s stomach, enough to distract him from the words that tumbled out of his mouth. “I’m not sure I have one, Ryuu. He’s kind of out of my league.”

“Don’t think about that for now. Or ever, really. That shit messes with your mind. Just think about whether or not you _want_ a chance. This could turn into something good, you know.”

Noya still wasn’t convinced. If anything, the heavy feeling in his stomach grew. “Yeah. Maybe.”

It was quiet for a good fifteen seconds. Noya didn’t understand why, not until he turned to Ryuu and saw the smug look on his face.“So you admit -“

“Still not admitting it!” Noya exclaimed immediately, turning away from Ryuu as his face slowly caught fire. 

“But you’re admitting there’s something to deny,” Ryuu said. “It’s as good of an admission as it’s gonna get. Suga owes me five thousand yen.”

Noya whipped his head around. “You _betted_ on me?”

“Suga started the bet. I’m just a participant.”

“You’re an _accomplice_ , you dumbass.”

Ryuu shrugged his shoulders. “Call it whatever you want, I’m five thousand yen richer.”

“Oh yeah, like you’d actually have the guts to take money from Suga. The only thing you let him pay for is rent and the groceries.”

The smug look on Ryuu’s face broke. “I feel bad, okay? He’s still like our upperclassman, even if we’ve lived with him for two years.”

“Clearly. It took you a good year before you stopped calling him ‘Suga-san’.”

“Shut it, man. You’re just trying to distract me.”

“I’m not trying to distract you from anything!”

“Okay, buddy.” Ryuu pushed his hands against his thighs and stood up. “When you’re finally ready to admit your crush on Asahi, like _really_ admit it, just let me know. My stupid thesis awaits.”

“Take back everything I said about you aceing your thesis. Everything. Hope it gives you hell.”

Ryuu flipped him off. “Little late on that one!” he hollered, before he disappeared from view. 

Noya shook his head. His best friend was ridiculous, but he had to admit he felt better than he did after he started work. 

He allowed himself to sit there for a minute longer, letting the momentary happiness from his friend’s antics fall across his bones, pushing away the wave of dread that would come with the realization about Asahi.

The happiness fell away in a rush. Oh no. How the hell was he supposed to face Asahi tomorrow -

“Noya?”

He broke off from his train of thought and looked up to see Ryuu’s head poking out from his room. “What?” he asked.

Ryuu had that constipated look on his face again -the look he got when he had something important to say. Something that’d either make Noya’s insides warm in affection or recoil in shock.

Ryuu gave him a look that, Noya realized later, was supposed to be reassuring. He just looked like he stepped on a mouse. “It’ll be fine. The dance thing, I mean. Pretty sure you’re not doing as bad as you think you are.”

Noya didn’t have it in him to correct Ryuu. Not when he had that soft, proud look on his face.It must have taken him a lot of courage to say what he did. 

Noya couldn’t tell his best friend that he was dead set on quitting, that he was barely getting by with his practices with Asahi. That tomorrow was his last day.

He exhaled. “Thanks, Ryuu.”

Ryuu exhaled, the awkwardness from his face transitioning to something more genuine. “You know I’ve always got your back, yeah?”

“I know. Now stop slackin’.”

Ryuu rolled his eyes and went back into his room. When sound of the door closing echoed throughout the apartment, Noya bolted from the couch and headed for the bathroom. As the water cascaded down and hit his skin, his thoughts washed through him like a wave bathing the shore.

Noya didn’t have a crush; Ryuu was messing with his mind. That or Noya’s own mind was confusing Asahi’s friendliness of some form of affection. It was easy to like someone kind, even when Noya didn’t think he deserved it.He couldn’t forget that he was planning to quit tomorrow. 

Noya leaned his head against the wall of the shower. After a long beat, he let out a low, frustrated groan.

*

Noya was late. 

It started when he forgot to set his alarm, padding through the apartment like it was any other day. Only when he saw Ryuu’s coffee mug in the sink and Suga’s work shoes gone from the shoe rack did he have the instinct to check the time. He spent the next few minutes flying from the kitchen to the shower to his bedroom, dripping all over the place as he hastily got dressed. He sped out the apartment and to the train just to make it to class.

Everything else seemed to follow - his teacher reprimanded him after class again for failing to bring his readings, he got held up at the train barrier because he forgot to top up his card _again_ , the cash he had on hand wasn’t enough for the trip back home - 

This is not how he wanted his last day to go. 

Noya reached the floor with the dance studio in record time, trying not to wheeze as he paused to take a breath.He heard voices before he saw them, both familiar. He stopped by the door, hiding behind the wall to keep himself out of view.

“ - I can’t, Daichi, okay?” It was Asahi, voice worn and frustrated at the edges.“But why not? You haven’t even tried.” Daichi’s voice. He sounded exasperated by something, like he’s dealt with the same issue a thousand times over. “This might be your chance, it’s pretty clear that he -“

“It’s not like that,” Asahi countered softly, almost dejectedly. “And it’s not. I don’t _have_ a chance.”

Daichi groaned. “Asahi. This isn’t like one of your dance auditions. You’re not sure there even _is_ competition. I bet you haven’t even asked.”

“There’s no point in me asking. Please don’t say I’m beating myself up again, because I’m not. This is just business.”

It was quiet for a second before Daichi spoke again. “Asahi,” he tried, voice strained but less exasperated than earlier. “Just…think about it at least.”

“You know I’ve been thinking about it. That’s why I’m saying there’s no chance.”

“Asahi -“

“Daichi, I appreciate what you’re trying to do -“

“I’m not just gonna let you mope like you always do!”

“I don’t mope!”

“You do! You’re -“ Daichi stopped for so long that Noya worried he’d been caught listening in. “Sorry,” he said in a lower voice. “Fine, I’ll lay off for now, but give it a bit of thought at least? It won’t hurt you to.”

The silence before Asahi’s answer was filled with hesitation. “Okay,” he said, and even Noya knew that Asahi wasn’t going to do as Daichi asked.

“Okay. I’ll be in the studio for a bit, so don’t wait up.”

Noya only had two heartbeats before he scurried away from the wall. He was halfway out the door to the hall when the studio door opened, Daichi walking out alone. 

Noya froze, his mind going on autopilot. “Hey Daichi!” he greeted all too loudly, his voice bouncing against the empty walls of the room.

Daichi looked up and stopped. “Oh hey, Noya.” He didn’t look all too surprised, but he gave a friendly smile. “Have you been here long?”

“Nah, just got here actually.” Noya peered over his shoulder, in the direction of the dance studio. “Should I come back later, or -“

“Stay,” Daichi said firmly. “I just stopped by to talk to Asahi, but we’re good. You two go ahead and practice.”

Noya had no inkling of what the conversation was about, but his stomach gave a strange tug nonetheless. From what he heard it didn’t sound good at all, but it wasn’t his place to bring it up. Not with Daichi, anyway. “Okay. Where you off to?”

“The studio downstairs. Again.” Daichi said. “I need a piece for the showcase, too. Hasn’t really been working out well.”

“Oh.” Noya looked over his shoulder. “Well, why not just practice with Asahi? Or here? There’s room.”

Daichi chuckled. “I’m not sure a piano would fit in the dance studio.”

The lightbulb in his head switched on. “Wait - you’re a pianist? All this time I thought you were a dancer, too!”

The thought seemed to horrify Daichi, judging by the way he laughed. “Oh god no. I took dance with Asahi one summer when we were twelve and that was the end of my dancing career,” he said. “I’d rather be making the music than moving to it.”

“You couldn’t have been that bad.”

Daichi shook his head gravely. “Trust me. People who’ve had the misfortune of seeing me always wonder how I’m friends with Asahi. Those plastic things outside events dance better than I do.”

“Ouch.” Noya winced in sympathy. “Well…good luck with your piece thing. I’m sure it’ll be great.”

“Well, I’ve been stuck on it for a while, but thanks.” Daichi’s smile was slightly forced and worn at the edges. Noya noticed for the first time just how tired he looked - it wasn’t just his conversation with Asahi then. “Let’s hope something good comes out of my isolation.”

“Isolation?”

Daichi shrugged. “Can’t fit a piano in the orchestra room,” he said. “I’ll see you, Noya.”

“Good luck!” Noya gave him one last friendly smile before passing him by, ready to enter the dance studio for the last time. 

“Hey, Noya?”

Noya spun around quickly, so much that spots appeared before his eyes. Well, spots were better than the thought process he was on. “Yeah?”

Daichi paused in thought, eyebrows pulled together. He looked a lot more stern that way. “Be patient with Asahi,” he said eventually. “He can be a bit…stubborn sometimes.”

Noya tilted his head. “Stubborn?” he repeated.

“It isn’t always obvious. Just give him time, and stop his train of thought before he starts worrying himself to death.”

Noya didn’t understand why Daichi was telling him this. “Not gonna lie, except for the last part that’s some pretty vague advice, Daichi.”

Daichi chuckled. The stern expression cracked at the edges. “Is it?”

“Yeah,” Noya said carefully. “I mean…Asahi seems to be doing okay for himself. He’s not completely helpless as far as I can tell.”

“And in the self-esteem department?”

Noya made a face.“It could be better, but he’ll get there.”

All defenses seemed to lower on Daichi’s face, and he smiled, soft and fond. “I’m hoping right there with you,” he said. “Sorry. It was probably kind of weird for me to tell you that.”

“It’s fine. You’re just being a good friend.”

“Oh, I don’t know about that.” Daichi’s hand came to rest at the back of his head, and he looked a lot more sheepish now than he did a few seconds ago. “Just…thanks, Noya, for being cool about it.”

“It’s nothing. I’ll be patient with Asahi, don’t you worry.”

“Good.” Daichi gave one last semi-awkward wave before he exited. 

When Daichi was out of sight, Noya allowed himself to breathe. He didn’t expect that kind of conversation. Along with the fact that he was supposed to be quitting today, it just made Noya’s heart feel heavier than ever. He felt like the worst kind of person to do this to people who did nothing wrong. 

But he had to. It was fair, it was right. Noya gave himself a few seconds to gather courage - not that he had much at the moment - before collecting his wits and entering the studio.

*

Noya pulled at the damp collar of his shirt. He felt like a chicken boiling in a hot pot with how hot it was in the studio. Even with the windows wide open, barely any air came in. Sweat dripped down his forehead and in his eyes too many times to count, which made him commit more mistakes.

“Your shoulders are raised here,” Asahi said, repeating the half turn they just did. “They’re - " He had reached out, but stopped as his hands were just above Noya’s shoulders. "Maybe a little more relaxed?"

Noya forced his shoulders down. This was his usual mistake; the turns were a close second. “Got it. What else?"

"And -" Asahi approached him slowly, hands outstretched towards Noya’s arms. He stopped midway and pulled them back to his chest so quick it made a light _thump_. "Um, it was the right arm extended, not the left."

Noya switched the position of his arms. “Like this?"

Asahi frowned, the crease between his brows appearing again. His hand on his chest twitched, but he didn’t reach out this time. “Yes, but - not exactly?"

Noya let his arms fall to his side. He pulled his gaze away from the mirror and to Asahi, whose hands were cradled to his broad chest. It made for a very amusing picture -someone so strongly-built moving so softly. Almost delicately even in everyday life.

“Asahi.” Noya let out his first real laugh of the day. "You can touch me, it's fine."

This made Asahi's already wide eyes grow to almost comical levels. “Oh…r-right. Okay.” His hands stayed right by his chest, unmoving. 

“Asahi! It's really okay, I promise. I won't know how to do this move properly if you don't direct me.”

“But -“

“Seriously.” Without processing the thought, Noya reached for Asahi’s hand and placed it on his left shoulder. “See? Not so bad, right? Now, how’d you want me to do it again?”

“O-Oh.” If Asahi was an open wire, he would have sparked at this point. The weight of Asahi’s hand on his shoulder eased, and he gently lifted Noya’s arm halfway. 

"Like this, kind of," Asahi said, after he angled Noya’s arm correctly. His voice sounded deeper with how close he was, much closer than Noya perceived him to be.

Noya stopped breathing. His heartbeat roared in his ears as he felt the pads of Asahi's fingers against his skin, his large hand easily making Noya's already small limbs shrink even more. He didn’t think this through - letting Asahi touch him meant having Asahi _touch_ him. 

"Kind of?" Noya tried to tease. He snapped his head to the direction of the mirror, where Asahi chuckled. Noya felt Asahi’s breath brush against his hair. Goosebumps rose on the line of his shoulders.

"More of then," Asahi answered. His cheeks pink and his eyes darted to Noya and away at five-second intervals.

Several corrections went the same way - Asahi gingerly and delicately directing Noya's arm and legs until they were at the right position, with Noya forcing the sound of his heartbeat to inconspicuous hearing levels and trying to keep his breathing even at the same time. Needless to say, it took nearly all of his concentration. 

“So…closer?” Noya turned his hand, so the back of his hand was against Asahi's palm. His skin felt rough against the tops of his knuckles and very warm. It sent a zing that went from his heart right down to his - 

_No._ Noya closed his eyes shut and forced himself to think of something else. Ryuu’s smelly socks. Suga’s month-worth of laundry that he forgot about at the start of the year. The onigiri Noya forgot about in his backpack one time. _There_ , ugh. That was disgusting enough to suffice. 

“- like that.”

“What was that?” Noya asked, chancing a look at Asahi from the mirror again. 

“I said you got it right,” Asahi repeated patiently. “Do you think you can handle a full run? I’ll do it with you.”

“Yeah. Yeah, let’s do it.” Noya sounded weak to his ears. Never mind that his muscles were starting to ache and the front and back of his shirt was drenched with sweat. While going sleeveless was definitely a good decision, wearing red was definitely not.

It’s not like Asahi was faring any better. He chose to wear a loose purple shirt today, and there were sweat marks everywhere as well, though not as bad as Noya. Still, it filled Noya with some sort of calmness - at least some part of Asahi was still human.

When Asahi called for a break, Noya collapsed next to his bag, waiting for his overworked heart to slow down as blood continued to pump through his veins. Dust specs floated down towards the floor near the rows of sunlight from the windows.

“Good practice,” Noya said, though it sounded more like a garble. He raised his arm up weakly, feeling like an overcooked noodle, and gave a weak thumbs up. “It was good, right?”

“Really good,” he heard Asahi say. Noya craned his head up; Asahi settled down on the floor an arms length away. He stretched out his legs in front of him, but kept his knees bent so he wouldn’t hit Noya’s head with his foot. “Let’s end early today.”

Something akin to panic seized Noya by the throat, cutting off his air supply. Even if he was seated on the ground, he felt like his head was spinning. “Really? You want to stop?”

“Not really,” Asahi said casually. _Casually,_ because he had no idea of Noya’s inner turmoil. “But…I feel like we both need a break. Don’t you?”

No, Noya didn’t think they needed a break at all. He chanced a look outside the window - the sun was still bright and blinding, bathing the courtyard and the tops of the trees in bright yellow light. This couldn’t be the end of it. Not yet.

“I don’t know, Asahi,” Noya said as calmly as he could. It was a failure - it came out rushed and a quarter frantic, some of his inner storm bleeding through. “Maybe one more run? Just to be safe?”

Asahi raised his eyebrow. “Safe?”

“You know! I still haven’t - I wanna get the part right. The last part, with - with the turn.” 

Asahi looked thoughtful when Noya chanced to look upon his face again. His lips curved into a soft smile, his eyes going along with it. “You’re really dedicated to this, aren’t you, Noya?”

Noya’s heartbeat slowed. “Of course! I told you I’d take this seriously, didn’t I?”

“You did.” Asahi capped his water bottle and placed it on the floor. “Okay. One more run, then let’s cool down. How do you feel about ice cream?”

“Ice cream?”

“I was just thinking we never really hang out outside the studio,” he said. His shoulders were so tense they went up to his ears. “Though maybe ice cream is a little childish? You don’t have to -“

“Alright!” The fluttering in his chest began again, and Noya didn’t push it down this time. It to spread down his arms and to his fingertips.“Okay. Yes, ice cream sounds great.” 

Asahi blew out a breath in relief. “Okay, let’s go.”

They went all the way to the cafeteria in the basement. It was emptier than when Noya last passed by it - maybe only five tables full. Even with the high ceiling it was sweltering, but it was considerably cooler than the studio. 

Noya bolted for the freezer, eyes immediately finding the only ice cream flavour that mattered.

“Found it!” He exclaimed, raising it up in the air. The coolness of the plastic and the ice inside felt like a relief against the skin of his palms.

Asahi chuckled from behind him. “Is soda ice your favourite, Noya?”

“Of course! It’s the best flavour there is!” His voice carried across the cafeteria, earning a loud ‘ _Shh!’_. Well, so much for being some form of impressive - Asahi probably thought he was some sort of child. “I mean, I was pretty crazy about this in high school,” he said in a lower voice. “Clearly that ship hasn’t sailed.”

Asahi didn’t look the least bit bothered by Noya’s reaction. His eyes crinkled as he let out a soft laugh. “It’s good that you aren’t ashamed of it. I always go for the safe option.”

“Safe option?” 

Asahi pointed to the pear flavour right beside the empty soda ice container. “Yeah, that’s pretty safe. What’s your favourite then?”

Asahi’s hand hovered above the glass sliding door of the freezer before he pointed to the lone one sitting at the bottom of the freezer. “That.”

It was one of the more famous ice cream sandwiches - those chocolate bar-shaped wafers with vanilla ice cream inside.“Oh, my friend Suga loves that one. Why don’t you get it?”

Asahi ducked his head. He was mumbling so quietly Noya had to ask him to repeat it. “Too much sugar.”

“Pretty sure one ice cream won’t kill you,” Noya said, pushing the freezer open and making a grab for the aforementioned ice cream and thrusting it in Asahi’s chest. “Think of it as a reward for good practice.”

“I should be the one rewarding you.” Asahi gingerly took the ice cream from Noya. A soft smile crossed his face, and Noya counted it as an accomplishment to counter his outburst over the soda ice cream. “Thank you. Should we get a table?”

“Not here,” Noya said hastily. Just thinking about it made his back pour out a new wave of sweat. “Somewhere a little less…hot, maybe?”

Asahi’s eyes lit up. “I know where we could go.”

*

Noya’s thought he cleaned all the rooms in this entire school. It surprised him now when Asahi led him up an unfamiliar corridor, one much cleaner and newer than the others. They entered an elevator Noya would have missed had Asahi not told him it was there.

“How is it I’ve never been here? And this elevator - this would’ve been really useful when I was lugging around a bunch of buckets and brooms, you know.”

“Not a lot of people know this building’s finished,” Asahi said. “And the dean is a little…harsh. He might have told you to go the hard way on purpose.”

“What!” Noya’s voice bounced off the elevator walls. “Come on.You can’t tell me that guy isn’t evil.”

There was an uncharacteristic twinkle of mischief in Asahi’s eyes. “Maybe he keeps it under his wig.”

Noya spent at least a second gaping. “Asahi! I didn’t know you had it in you!”

Asahi’s cheeks turned pink, but he just smiled wider. “You didn’t think I was some kind of goody-two shoes, did you?”

“Not for a second. I mean, why else would you have your hair?”

The elevator door opened just as Asahi reached up to touch the tail of his loose bun. It reminded Noya of Daichi’s earlier gesture as he left. He wondered which one of them infected the other. “Hey, I like my hair,” he said as he stepped out of the elevator.

“I know. I didn’t say it was bad. I like it, too,” Noya said as he trailed after Asahi. 

Asahi stopped walking. Noya’s brain caught up with what his mouth had to say.“I mean! It’s - It’s nice…is what I’m saying.”

The pink returned to Asahi’s cheeks. “You think so?”

Noya’s hands twitched at his sides. Someone like Asahi wasn’t allowed to be so cute - it did things to his heart. “Yeah. I mean…objectively speaking.”

“Oh.” The corners of Asahi’s mouth turned down. “Well…thank you. We’re here, by the way.”

They were in the middle of what appeared to be an empty hallway, except that it wasn’t. The entire place was tiled with beige. The sides were lined with silver rails that glinted with the light from the afternoon sun. As Noya stepped forward, he realized it was more of an open bridge; one that linked the old building and the new one they came from. 

“What…” Noya’s voice sounded loud, amplified by the silence around them. Birds tweeted in the distance. Even further was the sound of murmurs, details lost to the wind. 

Asahi beckoned him forward. Noya didn’t know when he got there, leaning his body on one of the rails. “You should see this,” he said. 

Noya walked over to Asahi, and in a second he knew Asahi was right. Beyond the rail was green - a square of grass and trees clustered at every corner - cornered only by five floors of small bridges linking buildings on the opposite side. The trees nearest them were close enough to touch, its leaves stretching towards them. 

They were on the highest floor. Noya could see everything from where they were - the balconies filled with potted plants, a little brown bird trapezing on the ledge on the third floor. . Above and beyond the sky was a vibrant blue with only the faintest wisps of clouds.

Noya looked on in silence as a light, warm breeze blew against his face. His thoughts quieted down until they were softer than the whispers of the wind.

“Do you go here a lot?” Noya asked in a whisper.

“I…yeah,” Asahi answered, just as quiet.“I come up here whenever I…need to hear my own voice, I guess. Or when I feel lost.” 

He looked at Noya with that sad smile, one that Noya has taken to calling his self-depreciating smile. It was only smile Noya disliked. “Is that weird?”

“Not weird,” Noya assured him.”You do a lot of thinking, don't you, Asahi?"

Asahi snorted. ”You've caught on, haven't you? Daichi says I spend twelve hours of the day thinking and the other twelve dancing."

"Sounds accurate.” Noya looked to the view, the silence settling into his bones. “I don't think I do enough thinking. Whenever I do I feel like my brain is going to explode."

"Please don't explode, Noya."

Noya gave him a smile. “I’ll try.”

Asahi started on his ice cream sandwich while Noya looked to the sky. It didn’t feel awkward for them to be quiet; Noya didn’t feel pressured to say something, didn’t feel like he had to force conversation. He hasn’t felt that in a long, long time. 

He didn’t get a chance to settle in too much before he remembered what he was supposed to do today. 

“So um.” Noya pressed his lips together, staring at his shoes. He’d changed out of Suga’s shoes - he refused to call them his - and his sneakers were in need of a wash. “How’s the partner searching going?”

“The what?” Asahi’s voice came out muffled, still eating his ice cream. 

“Partner search. You know - finding the person I’m standing in for. How’s that going for you?”

“What are - oh.” Asahi looked like he bit into a lemon. . The ice cream sandwich was gone. “It’s…no one’s come up yet, actually.”

“Oh.” The knots in Noya’s stomach loosened. “That’s too bad.”

“I’m sorry. I know I’m taking up your time.”

“You’re not! I promise you’re not. Beats cleaning toilets, you know?”

Asahi’s lips then settled into a relieved smile, and the last of his tense shoulders from earlier finally relaxed.

Noya’s stomach sank to his feet. The urge to tell Asahi the truth, to come clean, was overwhelming.

He gave himself a few more breaths before he looked at Asahi and called his name.

Asahi turned back to Noya in a heartbeat. “Yes?”

Noya’s words got stuck in his throat. Looking at Asahi now, Noya was doomed. How far apart could two people possibly be? Asahi was gorgeous and sweet and passionate. He knew exactly where he should be, despite the cloud of doubt constantly shadowing him. 

In contrast, Noya was okay at best. He was studying for a certificate out of necessity and working at a job that gave him more headaches than cash. He was stuck with community service. He was right when he told Ryuu he had no chance. 

“Why’s this your first time doing a duet?” He asked instead, feeling his entire body protest. He ignored it. 

Asahi looked like he hadn’t been anticipating that question. “Well I kind of…hate it, actually.”

“You hate it?”

“I…dislike it,” Asahi corrected, but the wrinkle of his nose told Noya otherwise. “I’d rather do an impossible routine than to do a duet.”

“ _That_ much?” Noya asked. “So just tell your teacher again. I don’t think he’d mind.”

“I’ve tried telling him, but he can be very pushy. It’s not a bad thing - he’s just trying to expand my range as a dancer. He’s right to.” Asahi’s shoulders slumped. “My range is very small.”

“If you’re an expert on one thing, does it really matter?”

“Kind of. I mean, I want to at least try new things, instead of playing it safe.” Asahi gave a hollow-sounding chuckle. “I’ve been telling myself this for about two years now.”

Noya turned on his side so he was facing Asahi fully. “Do you always do that to yourself?”

“Do what?”

“Put yourself down.” Noya fixed Asahi a look. “Asahi, you’re _meant_ for the stage. Anyone who’s ever seen you dance can see that. I haven’t seen you myself but I think you’d be great, if practice is anything to go by.”

Asahi smiled sadly. “Prepare to be disappointed.”

“Why the hell would I be disappointed? I’ve _seen_ you.”

“In practice. I’m…not always good on stage.”

“Stage fright?” Noya guessed. “Everyone gets that. I used to get that too.”

“I don’t think it’s stage fright,” Asahi said.“I don’t - I don’t always understand it. Not like I understand myself most days. Some performances are fine - I get by, but most I just…”

Noya was familiar with this mood by now. This was probably why Daichi spoke to him earlier. He moved closer. “I’m sure it’s not that bad.”

“But it’s never the way I want it to be,” Asahi insisted, the downward set of his mouth nearly etched into his skin. “I can practice everyday for months but when the big day comes - I fail.”

It was Noya’s turn to frown. “So, crowds?”

Asahi shook his head. “It’s their expectations, I think. I’m afraid of them seeing all my hard work, seeing my heart and soul on stage, and they’d think ‘Oh, I don’t like that at all’.”

“You can’t control what people think, Asahi.”

Asahi smiled sadly, like the truth of it was something he’s struggled with all his life. “I know, but I can’t help it.”

“No, no, I get it,” Noya said immediately.“But you’ve slaved your ass off on that dance? You love it, you love what you do. You have a place to show people what you can do. That’s already…” A pang of sadness slammed into Noya, the feeling spreading throughout his body. “That’s much more than what other people have,” he added in a smaller voice.

“I don’t mean to sound ungrateful.” Asahi sighed. “I think - and I’ve thought about this once - I think it’s because I never danced a routine I was completely in love with.”

Asahi’s words were enough to deter Noya’s attention away from himself. “Then why don’t you?”

“It’s…scary,” Asahi admitted in a small voice.

“Of course it’s scary, Asahi! Most things that are worth it are.”

A smile crossed Asahi’s face, reaching up to his eyes. “That explains some things.”

“What things?”

Asahi looked right at Noya, and in response, Noya lost the ability to move. There was something he was missing, something Asahi held close to his chest. Noya hadn’t a clue what it could be.

“Nothing too important,” Asahi finally said, turning his gaze back to the view in front of them. Sunlight had passed over the rails, and now dotted across the expanse of green. 

Noya let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. He searched Asahi’s face for the thing in his expression he couldn’t identify, but to no avail. Whatever was there was gone - either Asahi had concealed it or it was a trick of Noya’s own too-hopeful mind. 

Noya shook his head lightly. Yes, definitely a trick of the mind. “So why not just make one?”

“Make what?” Asahi asked.

“A routine you’re completely in love with,” Noya clarified. “Your dream…dance.” He cringed. “Ugh, no. That sounded horrible. Erase, erase, erase!”

Asahi laughed. “Oh wow. Noya…please never say ‘dream dance’ again.”

Noya sent him a weak punch to the arm. “Hey! That’s what you get with a mostly stream of consciousness way of thinking. The filter between my mouth and my brain is pretty thin. Almost nonexistent.”

“You seem to be managing just fine with it,” Asahi said. “Probably why everyone likes you so much.”

“Where did this come from!” Noya exclaimed. “Everyone liking _me?_ Asahi, did you forget how I even got community service in the first place?”

“Oh I remember. It’s more of…” Asahi’s hands flailed about, as if rotating his wrists would make him more eloquent. “You make everyone who talks to you feel comfortable - if that makes any sense. You make people trust you.”

“Are you for real right now?” Noya was incredulous. Everything Asahi was saying went against everything Noya believed about himself. “This is a joke, right?”

“I’m being completely honest here,” Asahi said. “I don’t know if I ever mentioned this but part of the reason why I don’t always hang out with the other dancers is because I always feel…out of place?”

Noya didn’t expect that conversation detour. “What do you mean?”

“They just - they’ve made their own world, you know? And they’re so different from me. It’s hard for me to open up to them…or to most people, really.”

Noya remembered what Daichi told him the day Asahi held auditions. “But not me?”

Asahi smiled softly. “Like I said, you made it easier.”

Noya felt his face grow hot, though he could blame it on the way Asahi looked at him. A different set of words clawed its way up his throat; unlike his spiel about quitting this felt slightly heavier. It made him want to get up and walk away, just like he always did when he talked about himself and his feelings. 

The words came out before he got a chance to stop himself. “I quit dance.” 

Noya’s voice rang throughout the bridge. Beside him Asahi’s eyes widened, all friendliness draining out of his eyes. 

“You want to quit our dance?” Asahi asked, his voice quieter than it usually was.

“N-Not our dance! I mean - I was talking about me. In…in high school,” he said. “I stopped dancing because…I quit. Just up and left it, turned around and never looked back. I never picked it up again until -“ 

_Until now,_ he wanted to say. He could have, but he closed his mouth before any other ridiculous thing could tumble out. Just saying this, something he hasn’t talked about with anyone in years, made his stomach feel like it was filled with worms. 

“O-Oh.” Asahi let out an audible breath, though to Noya it sounded more like a sigh of relief. “Sorry, I freaked out a little. I thought you meant you wanted to stop the dance now.”

“Well, I don’t. I’m staying as long as you need me,” Noya found himself saying, effectively burying the voice in his mind that kept pestering him to quit. “I’ve never…I haven’t actually talked about this in a long time, and I’m not going to lie, it’s freaking me out a bit.”

Asahi opened his mouth and closed it. He looked overwhelmed suddenly. “Did you feel pressured to quit?” He asked carefully. 

“I don’t know. I think so.” Noya looked down at his shoes again.. “I never really thought about it too much. My mind just…does this thing where it blocks most of my memories of that time.”

“You weren’t sad?”

“No. My friends think I am though.” Noya gazed up at Asahi and pushed a smile on his face. “But it’s fine - I’m still here three years later, right? I lived without it. I’m fine.”

Asahi’s frown deepened. “You don’t sound fine.”

Noya’s fake smile withered instantly; Asahi wasn’t as easy to fool with his fake smiles as he thought. “Suga and Ryuu say that a lot, too,” he said. “Well, lately anyway.”

“You might have been sad,” Asahi said. “I might be wrong, but…maybe you just didn’t let yourself feel it.If it were me - even just for a few weeks - I’d be miserable.”

“But you’ve been dancing forever. For me it was just - it was a hobby. Something I did with my friends. I shouldn’t have to be sad about it.”

Asahi fixed Noya with a look again - one that had his brows furrowing in the middle and made Noya want to move close, when normally his instincts would have told him to run. He would have tensed, but something in Asahi’s expression that was normally in everyone else’s wasn’t there.

“It’s probably a bit hypocritical coming from me,” Asahi said, “but it doesn’t really matter if it was just a hobby for you, if you’ve done it for a lesser time than I did. If you had to give something up, you’ll be sad. Especially if you had a lot of good memories from it.”

The words sank deep into Noya’s skin, seeping into his heart. “Really?”

“Yeah. It’s not wrong or anything, Noya. It’s just the way you feel. You shouldn’t have to be ashamed of feeling things.”

This was more difficult for Noya to digest. They bounced off him like light against a mirror. It wasn’t the first time he’s heard of it, but it was the first time he wanted to hold on to them. He wanted the words to be true; he didn’t know how he could make it so. Perhaps now wasn’t the moment. Suga’s voice filtered in his mind - one step at a time. 

“If I didn’t know better Asahi,” Noya said, “I’d think you were giving me love advice.”

Asahi backed away, nearly tripping over his own feet. “I’m the _worst_ person to be getting love advice from.”

“But why!”

“I don’t have much experience in it! And the parts I have experience on…” he wrinkled his nose. “It’s not really that interesting -“

“It is to me!”

“- but back on topic, Noya, why did you tell me this?”

Noya stopped. Ryuu’s words echoed through the chambers of his mind again. That little tidbit in his life always weighed heavily in his chest, always felt like an anvil pressing him down on his heart and lungs until he couldn’t breathe. 

And yet now he found that he could. His chest was feather-light as the breeze circling the bridge. He didn’t need to hide, not from Asahi, who was as gentle as ever.

“Well we’re partners now, right?” Noya said. “We’re supposed to trust each other and stuff. I just felt like it’d be fair for you to know.” He bowed his head. “That’s kind of why I’m…struggling to learn the dance. A bit.” He wrinkled his nose. “Just a little bit though.”

Asahi’s expression immediately shifted, the folds of skin in between his eyebrows appearing once more. “I didn’t expect you to pick the dance up right away, Noya,” he said. “You could have just told me.”

“I know, but…” Noya sighed. He couldn’t come up with the right words, and the ones he had sounded stupid in his head. “Personal expectations, you know?”

“Yeah, I know.” Asahi let out a soft sigh. “From now on if you’re having a hard time, I’d like it if you told me. You’re already doing so much, let me make it easier.”

Noya recognized the compromise Asahi was handing out to him. “Yeah, okay. You got it, Asahi.”

They fell into silence again, this time more calming than the last. The mess of knots in Noya’s stomach finally loosened to nothing. The sun started to dim, leaving an orange glow on the top line of the building across from them. Noya should be heading to his shift at the restaurant. 

“There is a routine, actually.” 

Noya turned to face Asahi, who was looking at his hands again. His voice had gone soft and almost wistful. “I’ve been thinking about it ever since I graduated high school,” he continued.

Noya leaned closer. “Tell me about it,” he said.

Asahi’s eyelashes fluttered rapidly, and then he looked down at Noya shyly. “It’s a story, actually. And it’s - it’s stupid now that I’m saying it out loud -”

“Don’t take it back - that’s not fair.”

Asahi exhaled, and there was a tiny smile on his face afterwards. “I won’t, I won’t,” he said. “It’s a story about…loneliness, actually. Going through things alone and then eventually finding your way back. It’s - that probably doesn’t make much sense, does it?”

The summary struck a chord with him, sounding so familiar but so far away.“Kind of,” Noya said.

“I don’t know if I can explain it, really. I think I’d have to show you.”

“So show me.”

“What - now?”

“Yeah now! Quick, while there’s no one here.”

“B-But…there’s no -“ Asahi’s eyes flitted about, “- space,” he finished lamely.

Noya rolled his eyes as he placed his hands on his hips. “Asahi, there’s plenty of space. See -“ Noya extended his arms and placed the tip of his finger against the end of the rail. “- this bridge spans three me’s with my arms outstretched. Just one verse.”

“We don’t have music -“

“I have a phone and the internet. Do you have a song already?” The frown on Asahi’s face told Noya he did. “Can I find it on the internet or is it like specially composed?”

“You can find it. It’s…It used to be popular,” Asahi said, before he reluctantly gave Noya the song title. Noya quickly found the song and let it buffer.

“Whenever you’re ready,” Noya said. 

Asahi, resigned to his fate, moved to the center of the bridge. He was a few paces away from where Noya stood. “Count to three,” he said. 

Noya did as he was told. The opening notes rang through the empty balcony. Asahi had one knee on the ground and his head bent. Around them, the world quieted down - chirping birds, murmuring students, the whistle of the breeze all faded to the background as Asahi took all of Noya’s focus. 

Asahi moved. His arm extended from his body slowly, curling forward until he extended to his limit. Like a flower he bloomed, the hunch in his shoulders ebbing away, his back rising until itdrew a straight line pointing up to the ceiling. 

Noya instinctively stepped back as Asahi swept his feet across the floor in a half circle. It didn’t take away Asahi’s focus - nothing could. Asahi lengthened his arm up, curving his hand inward, and bended so far backwards that Noya almost stepped forward. Instead, Asahi rose upward and lunged to his right, arms moving in every other direction. Always with grace and fluidity. 

Noya knew that Asahi always had his full attention when he danced, but this was different. He could feel emotions tugging at his heart, rising to the surface when all he ever did was push them down. Loneliness, sadness, emptiness. The overwhelming feeling of being alone. Having no direction and no motivation to move. He never knew he could see all that, let alone feel it to the depths of his being until today.

Asahi stopped just as the first chorus ended. It was just after he finished a turn that seemed to span an entire verse. His cheeks were red and strands of hair fell across his face. He breathed heavily, chest heaving with the effort as his eyes rested on Noya again. 

Whatever residual emotion from the dance faded quickly, replaced by Asahi’s own brand of shyness and self-consciousness. He bent his head slightly as he spoke. 

“It’s not…finished yet. And it’s an old idea I’ve had since high school so it might be a little dated? Some of the moves are a little simple, too. It needs a lot of work.” He paused, the corners of his mouth wobbling with the beginnings of worry. “You don’t have to say anything -“

“Asahi,” Noya interrupted before Asahi could tumble into another one of his rambles. “Why haven’t you done this routine?”

Asahi blinked as his eyes regarded Noya owlishly. “Because I - I didn’t think anyone would want to see a dance like that? And it’s not that -”

“You’re kidding me.” Noya stepped forward, until he was right in Asahi’s space. “This - This is the best dance you’ve ever - uh, danced!”

“No it isn’t,” Asahi said, but Noya could see the wary hope behind his eyes.

“It’s _so_ good!” Noya exclaimed, his voice echoing throughout the balcony and probably broadcasting throughout the buildings surrounding them. He found no inclination to care. “I could actually _feel_ the loneliness at the start, and then the part where you start to stand up and stretch around it’s like -“ 

He ran out of words, his fingers opening and closing as if to grasp some from the air. How was he to describe it anyway? What he witnessed was the beginning of a miracle. 

“Asahi, _Asahi._ ” Noya saw his arm reach out to touch Asahi. _“_ You’ve got to do this for the showcase.”

If Asahi looked shocked then, it was amplified by ten now. He looked at Noya like he was downright crazy. “No, Noya. This isn’t showcase material. No one would want to see -“

“Well, you’re never going to know until you _do_ it! All this time I thought you were only into solo dancing then you pull _this_ out? This is so different from what we’re doing!”

“Well…” Asahi wrinkled his nose. “I don’t really love our dance -“

“See? What’s the point in doing anything you don’t really like? Asahi, please tell me we’re going to use this. We have to. Takeda would _love_ this!”

A thousand expressions seemed to pass Asahi’s face, but Noya could pick up the flicker of hope that had taken residence in Asahi the moment he said it. “…You think so?”

Noya nodded so hard he grew dizzy. “You said expand your range, right? This is it right here, Asahi! There’s so much we could do with it! We could make it a canon at the start or you could start first then I’d join you at the second verse -”

“We?”

“What?”

“You said ‘we’.”

It was Noya’s turn to feel self-conscious. Dumb subconscious for thinking it, dumb mouth getting away from him. “I mean…I. If you wanted me to be your partner,” he said in an attempt to save himself. “I would. If you’d want me to be I would.”

“You really would?” Asahi said it in such a small voice. It was filled with so much hope and longing that Noya felt his heart squeeze in response. 

“Yeah,” Noya replied, just as soft. “I mean, it’s still up to you - this is your showcase piece. This is all you. But if you wanted to do this…it’s just so _powerful_ , Asahi. The world deserves to see it.”

Asahi appeared to wrestle ten emotions at once.The wait seemed to last forever. The wind picked up; it brushed loose strands across Asahi’s face and cooled the remnants of sweat from Noya’s back.

Then, Asahi opened his mouth to speak. “We can try,” he said in an almost-whisper. “I…I want to try this out.”

Noya felt the smile on his face, wide and poking at his cheeks. “I’ll be right there with you. I promise.”

He held his hand out in between them. Asahi then extended his own hand to clasp Noya’s, his own lips formed into a smile. Noya felt the warmth of Asahi’s palm spread from his hand all the way up his arm. They’ve sealed the deal, signed the contract. They were in this for the long run.

Noya should have felt nervous, or have the tiny voice in his head tell him that he was getting in way over his head again. A voice that suspiciously sounded like Ryuu but had the face of Suga. He was signing himself into another impossible situation, wasn’t he? One with expectations and demands higher than what he experienced for the entire week that he and Asahi began practicing. 

So why did he feel so light? So alive?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! ヽ(*⌒∇⌒*)ﾉ


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